Sunday, April 29, 2007

Pho Off

For those who seem to believe that the relationship I have with my ex, the infamous ISO, is absolutely hunky-dory with light and laughter, you'd be thoroughly mistaken.

Who's the villain here!

We do get occasionally fractious - though it's not often that we end up in fisticuffs ( we aren't rambunctious adolescents anymore after all! ) since the last time we indulged, it only ended in a dirty sordid December night far from Holy or Silent.

Even while we're travelling together ( why am I not travelling with my significant other Charming Calvin instead, you say? Long story behind that! ), we end up having the most peculiar conservations, terribly inappropriate filthy talk that no one should even think of having in a polite company. Even the impolite rabble would shudder at the thought, I'm sure. It's a wonder the well-set up police officers ( Yummmy..... ) here haven't decided to toss us in a shared cell for public indecency.

Then again they might fear getting too close to my ISO - who's been going around all day smiling licentiously at every available attractive man.

Paul : I hate you.
My ISO : Not what you said when you had your head down between my thighs.
Paul : That was two years ago. Don't incriminate me. They still have anti-sodomy colonial laws here, I'm sure.
My ISO : So? Was it because I dragged you to that river cruise?
Paul : No, I saw you half naked.
My ISO : Baby, that shouldn't make you angry. You've seen it all.
Paul : Baby this! How did you remain so slim, you bastard! You eat almost the same amount as I do.
My ISO : Note the almost.
Paul : Bitch. And you still have those pecs. You make me look like your Indon maid dammit!
My ISO : Think gym, morning jogs and taking stairs. And blisteringly hawt anonymous sex.
Paul : Bitchslut.
My ISO : You're still sleeping with me tonight.
Paul : Twin beds! Not together!

Now I know why we had several empty tables around us although the lil pho-selling shack by the river was relatively swamped with indigent hungry folk. Probably thought we were depraved capitalists there to corrupt the innocent.

Although some of the more muscle-bound innocents here certainly looked delicious enough to feast upon. Some of them so-called prawns they might be but hell, I'm starting to develop a seafood fetish.

Hell I could fuck them with the lights off. :P


Sue said...

Such language Doctor! Really, you should be ashamed! My virgin ears! (Wait, are they still virgin???) What has brought all of this sexual crisis on? Please explain what transpires in your head for the rest of mere mortals.

Allan Yap & Nigel A. Skelchy said...

Paul, I understand what you mean thoroughly. As those who are in relationships would I'm certain. hehehe

Cyclohelix said...

Hard to attain balance mutually in all aspects of a relationship. Just hope he get's into deep deep trouble, and u can swoop in there to rescue, most importantly act mature and show affection of care. Death by guilt and embarrassment seems like a good take for him to realise his lost back then...unless otherwise leave him out cold.(Not conjured by me, i've seen too much

cleo weiland said...

Dirty talk with - who else - someone who knows you already. It does get interesting, even after the relationship is over. The chemistry is almost always still there.

Makes me feel guilty though.Sigh.

You naughty, naughty man.

Mark said...

He's such a character, wasn't he?

closetalk said...

i HAVE told u earlier, how hot ure ISO seems to me, right? *grin*

PS: oooo... i'm de wheel of fortune! :)

savante said...

What kinda language, sue! :O

Hilarious situation tho, nige!

Nah, my ISO is nice otherwise :) Hope he doen't get into any trouble, helix.

But it's such fun having dirty talk, cleo :)

He is quite a man, mark and closetalk.