Monday, April 23, 2007

Funny Fellas

Guilty. I admit it. I might already be seeing someone regularly but I still can't help stealing looks at good-looking hunks as they pass me by ( that is if they don't end up violently gay-bashing me in dark corners of course ). Okay, stealing looks might be a serious understatement since ogling shamelessly - what I term a mental stripsearch - would come closer to the real thing.

Not even my close friends are safe from my wicked scrutiny.

Almost Pavlovian really! Hot guys passing by. Cue the endless drooling. It's a simple physiological reflex akin to the extreme whiplash straight boys get when overly-endowed hot hoochie mamas saunter by.

Models before the runway
Stop ogling, you naughty perv!

Which is why I'm surprised I wasn't mistaken for a drooling mental patient when I spent my time yesterday watching male models strut their hunky stuff down the runway. Hot guys. Drool. It was all I could do not to yell 'Take it off!' while shoving dollar bills down their pants.

Damn if only I looked half as good! :) Which is where I get to the point of this story. Just the day before Charming Calvin - who comes up with the oddest observations imaginable! - actually told me about the erroneous conclusions people have drawn about me.

Calvin : A lot of people think you must be somewhat good looking because you are humourous.
Paul : You gotta be joking. Handsome men aren't usually funny. They don't have to be.
Calvin : Hmmm...
Paul : Hell come to think of it, funny people usually look funny actually.

Not fishing for praise, I swear :)

Been living in my own skin for three decades now - and paraphrasing that crusty English professor, I gotta admit I'm grown accustomed to my face. Not saying that I wouldn't wish to wake up one morning miraculously transformed into a sinfully handsome Brandon Routh / Chris Evans doppelganger ( whereupon I shall descend into shameless cam-whoring and submit my application to Janice Dickinson's Modeling Agency just to rub shoulders and more with the delicious Sorin ) but if that doesn't happen, I'm not going to ruin my life thinking about it.

But it's true, don'tcha think?

Look around and you'll see that most hysterically funny fellas ( and funny gals as a matter of fact ) aren't all that good-looking - and usually vice versa. After all, really handsome hunks don't have to develop anything remotely resembling a self-deprecating sense of humour to draw people to their sides, especially when they can easily pull a worshipful crowd just by flashing their dazzling charismatic smiles. Why bother cracking a joke when you can just wink to get a screaming fan club?

Whereas the average joes out there have to work at it. Picking up perfect comedic timing takes time and talent which is why most funny fellas end up playing second fiddle or the background sidekick to the BMOC back in college :P

Stereotyping, I know. But I have actually encountered a hunk or two to prove the point I'm making. Like Mr Body Beautiful, this man I dated once or twice after flirting audaciously online in several torrid chat sessions. Talk about a serious lack of humour - though I believe God must have seen fit to balance the score after bestowing him with a whopping amount of good looks, anything more would have been patently unfair! Mr Body Beautiful took himself extremely seriously, couldn't find anything remotely humorous about trivialities and subsequently bored me to tears. Of course shallow me was intent to only stare at his pouty Jolie-like lips and his straining-to-burst-from-his-sleeves biceps while he described his work routine in a didactic monotone.

Hell he could have rattled off the tax manual and I'd still have been deliriously fascinated. :P

Of course there are exceptions to the Freakin' Funny Fellas Rule. Though he has a serious streak a mile wide, Big Bicep Barry does have his rare moments of hilarity while my ISO... well that man can be a serious hoot. Then again Barry claims to be a ugly duckling back in school ( gasp! ) while my ISO only picked up humour as a Chandleresque self-defense mechanism.


nyonyapenang said...

"Hell he could have rattled off the tax manual and I'd still have been deliriously fascinated. :P" ARE so funny, Paul!

strapping.shane said...

I guess that puts me in the same boat as you. Funny but not good looking. :P

Not fishing for compliments. :D

Anonymous said...

The way you put it, even if the humour IS sometimes misleading, yet it in itself is immensely sexy. Ooh-er :p

Anonymous said...

Well, I think what is so charming about funny people is the humour.
That is what make them attractive in comparison to the others.
Oh yeah! Sometimes good looking boys can just bore the hell out of ya! I have met a few that know nothing other than workout schedule and calories!
I would rather go for someone humerous. :) at least,I wouldn't be bored.

Janvier said...

A friend puts it thus:
"God made all men equal."


rpmnut said...

Gimme humour or a large pizza with everything on it. ;)

Funny people ROCK! :D

asm@di said...

alamak, since i'm not really that funny and not good looking then where does that leave me?

oh well, there's always my charm, hahahaha (i wish!)

William said...

Stereotypes or not, we normally associate fugly with these comments.... "errrrr, he has a sense of humour", "uhmmm, he has a heart of gold".

Annie said...

There's a photo of McDreamy and McSteamy when they were in their teens and they were geeks and ugly ducklings. NOW look at them! *faint* Beautiful creatures.

OK. You're not funny Paul. There, does that brighten your day? :D

People say I'm funny, does that mean I'm funny looking? Mmmmm.. Someone told me if somebody says your newborn infant was "precious" it means they're ugly and had nothing nice to say. sheesh.

jay said...

I'd rather someone I could have an intelligent conversation with and who has a funny personality than a hottie with no brain any day.

But then I again, i tend to not go after the hottest guys in the room but the down to earth regular guy.

Allan Yap & Nigel A. Skelchy said...

I know what you mean. There was this hunky masseur at one time and he could only speak one language. (NO OBSCENE REMARKS PLS) And it was hell communicating but boy the rest of it was fan-f**king-tastic. ;-)

rpmnut said...

A book with a pretty cover is something.

A book with a pretty cover and hilarious contents is even better.

But since we can't have everything, give me a pre-loved, mildly creased and dog-eared paperback copy of Calvin & Hobbes and I'm a happy camper.

Evan Owens said...

Funny people are funny looking? Dammit. People keep telling me I am funny! Maybe they meant that I was funny looking and actually witty funny! Noooooo!