Tuesday, April 17, 2007

The Young Riders

If dim sum mornings make me think of the Shanghai Bund, obviously munching on nachos for supper brings me back to the Wild Wild West.

Fortunately I haven't combined the two to get stinker Shanghai Noon yet.

Ever dreamt of riding on horseback towards a fading sunset? Facing down dastardly villains at high noon with guns blazing? Although I am pretty sure a couple of days in the wilderness miles away from the nearest God-forsaken outpost of civilization would drive me slowly insane, the idea of the lone pioneer blazing a trail through the wilderness ( and blissfully trampling on the rights of the bewildered natives ) still manages to inspire.

And yes, it does makes me dream imagining what it's like braving that final frontier, perhaps even being one of the first few physicians out on the trail ( together with that infamous Dr Quinn, Medicine Woman! ) ministering to some hot young cowboys - and finding out exactly what I can achieve with some of those mysteriously phallic-shaped medical instruments of the past :P

Jake Gyllenhaal
Come Brokeback with me!

Who knows, maybe somewhere along the line I could even find a happier ending to Brokeback Mountain by wrangling my own Jack Twist to share a bedroll with. Although with my luck - rather than getting laid by lonesome western studs, I'll probably be trampled by runaway bulls.

The thought of that cowboy is almost enough to make me forget about shopping - since God knows there would be nowhere to shop in New Hicksville, Nowhere County unless I'm in the market for ten-gallon hats.

What brought this up? Not only munching on nachos and trail mix all last weekend ( courtesy of Big Bicep Barry's bounty ) but also several hours straight of non-stop westerns. Quite enough to make me start swaggering with machismo, spitting nonchalantly and speaking with a twang. One of my favourite series ever, Young Riders is out on DVD finally - and shockingly I actually stumbled over it during one of my own wild west expeditions through Sri Hartamas. Thank the Lord for the ever-efficient vagabonds for sourcing something wonderful I thought I'd forgotten.

For those too young to know - as most of ye young whippersnappers online are! - the Young Riders tells the tale of several intrepid riders of the Pony Express, all with contrasting characters and personalities from the serious, soft-spoken southerner to the brash orphan girl in disguise, the typical hot-blooded gunfighter wannabe to even a half-Kiowa hunk in search of his identity. Easy enough for non-history buffs, think of the Pony Express as the internet e-mail and courier express of the Wild Wild West, only on horses.

Loved the series so much that I even tried horseriding once upon a time - though I sucked majorly at it since I have almost zero coordination. Learned that the only way I could ride was on a lame one-eyed pony on flat, stable ground with myself strapped onto its harness, and even then there was no guarantee that I wouldn't slip off.

Guess I'll have to find a sweet-eyed cowboy to teach me the ropes. :)


Dashing Dan said...

Horse riding is pretty tough. There used to be one place in Melaka to ride, which is where you probably tried it.

Young riders, heh. I doubt Shane knows the show. :p

suicidalconversationjunkie said...

Tried horse-riding once as a kid, I remember yelling so much in my enthusiasm the horse got pretty restless. Lucky nothing induced it to just speed away and throw me off to the heavens. :p

xoussef said...

No need to learn horse-riding, i am sure a generous cowboy might take you in a ride on his horse.
Of course any physical contact would be only to prevent you from slipping off. ;)

Yen said...

Always liked Heath better, until I saw Jarhead. Now I think they are both truly man-gods!

savante said...

Doubt he knows! I'd faint if he did, dan.

That's close to what I did, junkie.

Ooh, xoussef, now where do I find that generous cowboy!

Haven't seen Jarhead, missed that on HBO, yen.


Evan Owens said...

I am sure you're familiar with ropes by now, eh Paul? :P