Monday, July 09, 2007

Blue Spanish Eyes

With relatively free-seating during Chinese banquets, you can count yourself lucky if you're not seated between irksome relatives and bothersome frenemies. Or that amiable though mindlessly chattering fifth-auntie you're obliged to invite. Fortunately in my family we like lists - and table seatings are a prime favourite.

A fortunate circumstance since during a prolonged Chinese ten course dinner, you can find out the most peculiar things about your friends. Guess the free-flowing river of alcohol helps loosen the tongue. Unfortunately Big Bicep Barry's shirt remained puritanically buttoned despite my determined attempts to get him thoroughly soused.

Club's in session
Rock on!!

Okay. I admit he did unbutton a bit as the dinner progressed since the restaurant was turning unbearably hot. Being the gentleman that I am, I refrained from leaning over to squeeze lime on his chest and lick the deep cleft between his pecs.

Not to mention Charming Calvin was watching with evil eye barely metres away as he chomped suggestively on his durian chocolate cake.

Still... over abalone and shrimp, Barry managed to let fall several of his secrets from eschewing shark's fin ( a budding environmentalist this one ) to his fantasy of turning into a crazed guitar-banging rockstar.

Barry : I could wear hot leather pants, break my electric guitar and scream on stage.
Paul : You can do that right now.
Barry : Nah, people watching.
Paul : You could unbutton your shirt. Rockstars always unbutton.
Barry : Very funny. I was even a woman once. A Spanish seniorita.
Paul : You're a Spanish woman?
Barry : In a past life, si senor.
Paul : Holy transsexualism Batman!

And then he started to wax lyrical over Yang Guifei chanting favourite lines from a classic poem no doubt memorized back in school. Me, I count myself lucky if I can recall Three Blind Mice. Wouldn't have surprised me if Barry had been a reincarnation of that particular besotted poet since he seemed hopelessly enamoured of the rumoured full-figured Chinese beauty of ancient times.

Or it was the vodka talking.

15 comments:

Ryan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ryan said...

Oops! I just want to make a correction of my grammer. Never know that delete the comment will leave a "mark" there.

"Being the gentleman that I am, I refrained from leaning over to squeeze lime on his chest and lick the deep cleft between his pecs."

Wow... well-written! Included in my dictionary of "quotable-quotes"!

However, I wonder how it will be if you actually never refrained yourself from doing that? Forget about how Calvin will re-act, I am more interested to see if the remaining 8 people at the same table will start vomiting or impressed?!

charming.calvin said...

The rest of the people would stuff him with the durian chocolate cake, his favourite dessert.

And the things that you did, I know it all......

William said...

Did he rant about the Beancurd Beauty?

Queer Ranter said...

Yummy to the durian chocolate cake~~~

I want...

Never tapau...

drownedglass said...

Woah, woah, woah... back up a bit there...

DURIAN CHOCOLATE CAKE???

Ryan said...

Durian Chocolate cake?! Is it so nice? Where can I get them? Secret Recipe?

Charming Calvin, what things? who did? Detail detail, please!! LOL...

Janvier said...

Oh, and here we have to make do with Crispy Durian Puffs and Durian Donuts... :'(

coolgardy said...

Must be all that vodka talking and durian chocolate cake?
Where is this restaurant, so that I can like avoid it?

Stephen said...

I've tried the infamous durian. I think durian chocolate cake might just work. It's got to be better than trying to prise sticky goo out of a spiky husk with your fingers.

gaia19 said...

Flirting with the boyfriend there? How shocking *g* You know if I was Calvin, I'd get a complex the way you lust over Barry. But hell it's amusing to read ♥

jay said...

Your ability to describe situations so vividly only leaves me to wonder how you immersing your dirty talk to your bf must be. LOL.

:: samasam :: said...

durian chocolate cake? never heard and never try before? mana nak dapat tuh..??

jason said...

I supposed the cake came from Just Heavenly, Damansara??

savante said...

Quotable quotes, eh? :) Thanks, ryan. I think Calvin will sulk if I actually licked his chest.

See what I mean.

What beancurd beauty, william?

IT really does smell of durian, queer rant.

Really delicious according to those who had it, ws! And you can them at Just Heavenly - jason guessed it right.

gaia, nah it's just innocent flirting. Calvin wasn't jealous at all.

Paul