Friday, May 25, 2007

True Love Waits

Unbelievably groggy today though not from an overdose of sangria or rum as it is. Much thanks to Nuffnang actually - who happily provided us with tickets to a late night screening of the latest Pirates of the Caribbean. :)

James Norrington
My darling Norrington is in the movie as well and looking mighty fine...

Seriously, if you intend to watch the finale of the Pirates of the Caribbean, you'd better hang on before you finish this post since semi-spoilers abound. Just grab some rum, go watch the crazy convoluted caper ( half the time I got confused who exactly was in cahoots with who! ) and come back to read this.

I know they say that true love waits but is that really true? Is it really possible to wait ten years only for one single day with that perfect someone - even if that perfect guy was a perma-tanned, leanly muscled Orlando Bloom in dashing pirate guise?

That's the conclusion we're supposed to swallow at the end of the swashbuckling trilogy of pirates, plunder and princesses. Certainly reluctant, the newly elected ( and certainly frustrated ) Flying Dutchman seems doomed to sail the seven seas for eternity - with only a small caveat of coming to port for a measly day every ten years while his poor sailor's wife remains ashore in wait. Really. I know it's dashing Will Turner and I certainly would love to get into his sexy bloomers so to speak but hell, one orgasm in ten years? You gotta be fucking kidding me.

And though optimistic young'uns like Strapping Shane do see this tragic long-distance-relationship working out, I'm always full of my doubts.

The first decade.
Dutch : I'm back and I love you.
Wife : My darling. You have returned. Kiss me, my sweet.

The second decade
Dutch : I'm back and I love you.
Wife : Hi, husband. Meet your son. He needs new clothes. I need a new oven as well.

The third decade
Dutch : I'm back and I love you.
WIfe : Yeah yeah. What else is new. Bills are over there by the table.

The fourth decade
Dutch : I'm back and I love you.
WIfe : Say hi to my new husband. He's my lawyer by the way. Sign this.

Really. Judging from the collection of swoon-worthy romances in my library, you'd expect me to be more than a touch sentimental in my tastes with rose-tinted glasses in my pocket ( though slightly smudged with cynicism ) but even I have a serious streak of practicality running through all that pink mushy goo. Surprisingly I ( idealistic me! ) still find myself hoping for a love that lasts forever - but the idea of twiddling my thumbs waiting for that special someone to arrive just doesn't mesh well with my impatient nature.

Much less waiting patiently for ten years just for only one precious day to be together. I know I'm no paragon. I doubt I have the fortitude needed to sustain a relationship through ten years of working, waiting and wishing. After one full decade, it would only take a passing hunky sailor to accidentally blink sand from his eye ( a possible wink? ) for me to be all over him like a slobbery octopus.

Then again, it's Orlando playing Will Turner. Things might have worked out different if I'd been waiting for the honourable ( and terribly dishy ) James Norrington instead. :P

14 comments:

strapping.shane said...

Norrington sucks. All hail Cutler Beckett! :P

Jonzz said...

ARGH! Read the spoilers.... Should have heeded the warnings! Sigh...

charming.calvin said...

You can't depend on love to solve every single problem now, can you? Love will not put food on the table. Is it necessary to think about the practicality after love?

jay said...

The issue with this type of relationship is that love grows and changes form over time and with only one day every decade, their love cannot grow as they change.

That being said, I do believe anything is possible.

Jayelle said...

WTF WTF WTF

you were there and you didn't come and tell me that you are PAUL???

*hentams you*

how can..:(

I cannot go and brag to my friend that I met you. Sob sob sob..

closetalk said...

ummm.... u know, i think i OUGHT to say dat i dont believe in long distance relationships, esp sicne i got dumped in one myself - but the mushpot in e refuses to see reason and sez instead 'maybe....'

am an airhead.

Dashing Dan said...

Waiting 4 months already seems to be ever so tough. @.@

Queer Ranter said...

*arrrrg

Shiver me timber~~~ :P

Cyclohelix said...

just got back from that 3 hours flick, and i would conclude somewhat mixture of pirate glam with political pirate posh, not to mention the culture clash.

Norrington come close to resemblence of Freddie Prince Jr. in some angle (refer to Down To You, the costume ride)

mstpbound said...

um am i the only one that hated the 2nd one so much that i could only watch the 1st 30 minutes of it? i mean, i didn't really find the jokes all that funny. maybe i was missing something. :/

William said...

They have my vote of confidence!

R*Y A N said...

i still think that captain sparrow and wil turner should have bonked each other.

c'mon, every-bloody-thing else seemed to have been included in that butt-numbing movie!

_ethnwg said...

10 yrs, one orgasm.

wow.

Can die man.

savante said...

Cutler is a midget who roasts, shane.

Well go catch the movie quick then, jonzz.

Well I'm always practical, calvin. Which is why I'll say poor sailor's wife.

I wish anything was possible as well, jay but sometimes extenuating circumstances leave our hands tied.

How! I didn't know which one you were, jayelle! Such a large crowd!

Always reason to be optimistic, closetalk!

Well I did warn you before, dan.

True enough, queer rant.

Freddie Prinze? Seriously, helix. Gotta take a closer look at Norrington then.

Didn't like the second one either, mstpbound :P

Well they'll need it certainly, william :P

How kinky would that be. But it would certainly liven up the movie, ryan.

I know! How could they stand it, ethan! I know life is more than sex but...

Paul