Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Strike a Pose

What is the first thing people ask of you when you get online to chat? Apart from the naughty sordid cybersex stuff of course ( which I'm actually quite willing to comply since I'm pretty much an online sluttina ), most of them start with a simple request for pictures. Or at least the gay boys usually do.

Paul : Hi.
Stranger : Hi. Can I see your pic?

Is that how we meet people these days? No doubt they wish for some personal verification that I'm not a doddering yet still perverted octogenarian gasping on an oxygen mask while scouting for younger meat. Easily solved of course for anyone in possession of a half-decent camera.

Unfortunately I am not one of them.

In hiding
Oh my pure hideousness!

Let me rephrase lest you think I'm some throwback to the dinosaur age. Yes, I do have a camera, even have a camera-phone come to think of it. But I have an understandably chronic aversion to the camera, possibly since realizing that I don't come anywhere close to the glossy, airbrushed visual perfection of Chris Evans / Brandon Routh. Such a disappointment snapping a picture of myself only to realize that it's only blah averageman - which is why I have never ever taken more than an average of ten pics in a year. Apart from enforced photo shoots at work - and those required by the government ( passport mugshots and such ), I doubt I have ever taken a shot of myself.

I'm certain to be greeted by disbelieving stares but it's true. Actually spent a whole month trudging happily about Europe only to realize that I'd only finished half a roll of film on my return - whereupon I was visited by the unholy wrath of my horrified shutterbug brother who insisted that I document every tree, lamp-pole and road sign the next time I travelled. Needless to say on my next trip to Shanghai I obligingly took a photo at every spectacular ( and unspectacular ) monument I visited.

Unlike some of my more trigger-happy pals such as Lanky Lex who seem to find such prurient joy in committing a memory to film - as he'd probably phrase it. No doubt he could fill an entire photobook with an hour in the Eiffel Tower. For me, I only took two shots - one close up and one from half a mile away. :)

But I took a few of the gorgeous Frenchmen to balance it out. :)


Sue said...

All you need to do to fix that is travel with a friend who can help you with what needs to be memorialized on film. "Oh! Let's get a photo of that!" You'll see how many rolls you'll go through then!!!

Shigeki said...

and you are going to share those frenchmen with us? There is always the best angle for every object you take a photo of :-) really :-)

Anonymous said...

Wow! Well, I went to Amsterdam with some friends recently.
From the 4 days 3 nights trip, I took somewhere about 80photos which I consider quite a lot.
Guess how much did my two other friends take?
They took about 250photos each! That's like 3 times what I took!!!
I had to wait for them at every place. They just can't stop taking!!!!

mstpbound said...

i'm just like you. :) i don't like taking pictures...but not for the same reasons! for some reason, i always break my camera within a week or so of getting it. :( :( i don't know why, haha... i guess i'm just unfit for a camera...

Musang said...

where's the frenchmen pictures?!!!

show show show!!

Janvier said...

We've never took many pics while using a film cam, but with a digicam now we make sure to snap up everything, our own memory is that bad that we'll forget loads in no time :s

redgalaxoid said...

I always laugh at guys on chatrooms who get mad at me because I don't want to unlock my photos as soon as they ask...It's like they are phisically unabled to talk to someone who isn't publishing his assets...
One problem I have with photographs is that I love to take them, but then many times I come back from traveling and realize I'm not in one single photograph...

William said...

You sound like my brother.

cleo weiland said...

Sometimes people get so carried away 'documenting' every minute of their lives that they forget to appreciate the moment.

I rarely take photos of myself too, I'm quite critical of how I look in em.

You're only normal I guess!

savante said...

I did! My friends spent their times taking pictures of peonies and poles, sue!

Gotta go dig up those photos then, shigeki and musang.

250 photos. OMG. How did they do that, k!

Break a camera!? You can join Big Bicep Barry in that then, mstpbound :)

True enough, I do have a digicam too, janvier.

Same here! Not to mention I have tons of postcards but no pictures of myself, redgalaxoid.

I am your brother, william. Muahahahaha.

But you look fab, cleo! take more pics!


Sue said...

Find different friends quick!

Jeremy said...

Yes! Yes!! I thought I was the only one in the world who does not take photos and who dislike sharing photos at the first/second instance of chatting. In fact, my camera is still the old type. No digicam, not even mobile phone.

jay said...

I agree with Cleo. I'm quite guilty to trying to capture the perfect shot that i forget to enjoy the moment.

Example, a recent fireworks show, I kept trying to get the perfect picture that I didn't enjoy the show as much as I should have.

I realized this close to end and turned the camera off.