Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Dream Buys The Sequel

Although I lean towards frou frou romantic Bohemian ( just imagine crazy gypsy with a penchant for collecting junk ), that certainly doesn't mean I don't appreciate design. Every once in a while, I do dream about that futuristic minimalistic look for my home - all sleek steel and shiny glass - but I doubt metallic avant garde design would go down very well with my hand-woven persian rugs and crumbling chinese antiques. It would look positively schizophrenic.

And I'm sorry but for now, I'm still much too attached to my ornate, delicately painted cabinets, no doubt courtesy of blindly dedicated, sight-challenged Tibetan monks slavishly carving inside secret complexes hidden deep in the Himalayas.

Down in the kitchen
Househusband to be...

Monastic monks aside, that still doesn't stop me from drooling over these spectacularly expensive designer objects - as Strapping Shane would know. Dragged the poor guy through the horrific lengths of the kitchen appliances department and I'm sure he's still staggering from the excruciating experience. Footloose single guys and avant garde electric blenders just don't mix.

Went into one of those super upmarket stores - which I find thoroughly amusing since I am not sure who exactly buys such sinfully expensive kitchen products apart from ambitious interior designers trying to impress ( since we all know that fabulously wealthy datins and tai tais spend all their time doing their manicures and facials which precludes regular cooking sessions ). Even the harassed - though beautifully coiffed - storekeeper had her doubts as I could hear her muttering away 'Let's hope somebody buys this'.

Well, she wasn't all that wrong since I had half of a mind to purchase these designer babies myself but knew that with my lousy hours, I wouldn't have the time to use them. Sigh. Anyone in need of a desperate wannabe househusband? With the inadvertent help of Martha Stewart, swear I'll bake, cook and clean without much complaint! I'll even wear a frilly apron with the prerequisite Kiss The Cook tagline! Just no scraping dirty woks in the sinks please.

alien juicer

Seriously. Cost a whole freaking fortune for an alien juicer from Starck - that you gotta use manually and sweat all over probably while cursing and swearing for one pitifully small cup of lemon juice.

But look. How pretty!

whistling bird

Whistling Bird stainless steel teakettle, with sugar bowl and creamer. I know it's so 1980s but I love the design from Alessi. Not sure whether it really whistles like a bird but hell, imagine placing it on the gleaming kitchen table to the envy of the suburban desperate housewives. Certainly worth killing for!


Or even the Pito Kettle by Frank Gehry. Look. Fish!

alien juicer

Mamma mia! Look at the luscious Anna G all dressed in sheer black! Doesn't it make you wanna do wicked decadent things like corkscrew her away? Alessandro Mendini sure knows his women.

BRead Bin

Armadillos are pretty ugly critters but they sure do make pretty bread bins. Come on, imagine serving breakfast with this as the centrepiece. How is the handsome working hubby not gonna be inspired to eat a toast or two?! Or to toss you on the hardy pine kitchen table and ravish you like freshly baked bread.

Charming Calvin, look closely. Christmas is coming. Maybe we can get them for the kitchen.


Lavish Louis said...

Oh Paul! Stop coveting these meaningless pretty things. It is just something that you want so that it discriminates you from the haves and the have nots. Better you buy some thick Anaesthesiology books and pass your exams so that you can earn more money for the household, discover new knowledge for mankind and reduce the gross deficit of the country.

How about that lunch/dinner? Give me a call.

Vengelyne said...

I think you'll get along very well with my mom. She's into these kinda things, too... which always has my dad complaining - waste of money.

strapping.shane said...

All that was memorable to me was the fact that I held in my hands - a THREE HUNDRED DOLLAR cake server.

THREE HUNDRED DOLLARS! I can feed a whole family of five for two weeks!

Anonymous said...

I enjoy walking down kitchen department and sometimes I even buy things that look pretty but I have no use for. Unfortunately I don't cook that often but when i do cook I have all the necessary appliances.

Anonymous said...

My sister's husband is into all the modern stainless steel and stone stuff. Their kitchen looks like a prison unit; so cold. She is jealous of all of my Tibetan rugs, Morrocan lamps, carved furniture, and floral sheets. So I say bah to all those modern things. I'll take the warm cozy stuff any time.

Anonymous said...

i absolutely adore a well equipped kitchen. when i FINALLY get my own place the first thing i'm going to do is build my own spice rack. stainless steel plates and unfinished pine boards to make a delightful amalgam of natural industriousness!

Anonymous said...

New Blog up and ready!!

Ban said...

Most of them just don't go with your decor, dear doc. And the price tag - phew! You should know what I'd have to say about items like that.

JL said...

i don't know why but Anna G just spooks me out... seramnyer

danielhenry said...

you're worst than me... you shop... or think of shopping like mad!
and... art nouvo, art deco... don't go well with... antiques... spare the sights of your future visitors...

Anonymous said...

That pot is so Frank Gehry! But I'm saying thanks but no thanks to the juicer. It looks like it's one of those creatures from War of the Worlds.

charm.calvin said...

I have a kitchen which I don't use, you have a kitchen which you don't use. And we need kitchen stuffs for?

I'll buy condoms.

Anonymous said...

That bread bin looks like it can take off a hand.

joshua said...

hahaha.....(to charm.calvin's comment above)

well perhaps condoms would be useful in the kitchen.reminds me of several HOT scenes in QAF which took place in the kitchen...

Anonymous said...


of course we buy them for usage and appreciate the designer's achievements and such but are they worth each crisp RM50 notes? hhmm...

Anonymous said...

Paul Darling,

Lovely items, a definite must have in the gay and chich kitchen!!

Calvin..condom's? How unoriginal darling...unless its one of those unique ones :P

buzz buzz

Anonymous said...

my so called friends repeatedly refuse to buy me the citrus squeezer that i wanted. even though i have ask them again and again on christmas and birthday occasion and they just refuse to get that for me. reason behind, which i dont even remember anymore. i am sure you might like a few items from georg jensen too.

well kitchenware, there are lotsa fun in cooking but then again foods are stone throw away from anywhere. and that defeat the whole purpose of cooking in afterall.

Anonymous said...

Geez, do they actually work or just an art piece. I don't know...just send me to Wal-Mart or Target and I'll pick up my kitchen goods.

strapping.shane said...

Condoms are a smart idea Cal! =P

MishL said...


It has been ages since I checked out your website but on a rainy Thanksgiving Day, and the first time in months that I did not have to be out of the house by 8:00 AM, I was in the mood for happy endings. I guess it had been ages, because I didn't even know you had a blog! But now I can't link to your stories. Do you still write or is this new course in your life taking over all your free time? Ohh and the kitchen junk ... not for me. If I had any inclinations to cook (that's my son the sushi chef's domain) I would go for big copper pots, huge walk in stone fire places with the pre-req dog warming up on the Persian rug, and a well paid cook at the stove. But that's just me lol.

And whoever can feed a family for two weeks on $300 obviously does not live in the New York metropolitan area. My family would not last even one week!

Anonymous said...

I think it's a complete waste of money. People who buys these things.. well, should just give their money to me.

Musang said...

hiks. calvin is a realist. good catch there paul darr. :)

so now, did you guys done it yet?

sex in the kitchen, that is.

Anonymous said...

Me, I'm much more of an Ikea kinda guy. Ermm, is Ikea considered as futurist minimalistic?! I SUCK at interior design.

*ROTFL at Musang's remark*

But, also curious to know. Coz, that's just HAWT!!! ;p

Anonymous said...

*evil grins to Cal's idea*

nice kitchen are splendid but when the mess of cooking process occurs, who would actually want to clean it all up?

savante said...

No prob, louis :)

But it looks so pretty, vengelyne.

No worries, I was shocked myself, shane.

Well, cr, this makes the cooking all so much more fun, dontcha think?

Warm, cozy stuff, sue,.. :)

Spice rack... that reminds me. confusticated, I need to get that.

Whoa. Why cajunwolf, jamie?

I'd have to beg, borrow or steal from ya, ban.

Why spooks you out? Anna G is sweet, jl!

Yeah, true, it doesn't really go with the rest of my house, daniel henry.

You know Frank Gehry :P That's so great, mark.

We have plenty of that, calvin.

Yeah, it does look like a vicious armoured arm, william.

And Joshua... been there done that. :)

Yes, they are shah!

Nah, we use the usual ones. Nothing weird about the condoms, fly.

Just wish they'd get me that fior Christmas too, anon.

The juicer looks like it works, rick.

Damn. I'd love to have a sushi chef for a son, mishl. Sashimi!

Cliff :)

Long time ago, musang.

Doubt that. Bet your place looks lovely, ahmad.

I'll clean it up, ikanbilis.