Kissing Frogs

I know girls are supposed to go around kissing frogs before they finally land that prince. But sometimes I wonder whether locking lips with tadpoles grown in a muddy dating pool is really worth it. Especially when it seems like the world's an endless mucky swamp where dastardly frogs abound. And princes seem to be scarce.

Yet these intrepid damsels seem to soldier on their determined quest to find their prince, falling for repulsive frogs all the same. Not sure if it's their charming croak or the way they hip hop but somehow princesses seem to forget their boundless dignity in stooping to pick them up.

Seriously more than a few I'd have preferred sauteed slowly over a grill. Frog legs anyone?

But just take a glance around town and you'll see the Princess and the Frog Syndrome all around in dozens of guises - while you'd find it hard to catch the opposite. Close to miraculous to glimpse a rare sighting of the Prince and the Beast.

Guys just don't go for frogs.

Sure the forgiving ladies are reputed to be able to look beyond the superficial to find the budding prince within.... but sometimes I wonder whether they realize that some of these frogs are just plain frogs. That no matter how deep you pry, you ain't gonna find Chris Evans amongst that disgusting muck of boils and warts.


Are you my Prince?
But some girls persevere - as Fabulous Fiona did - hoping to find their happily-ever-after. Though I never could see any noble quality in any of the frogs. Far from attractive, far from charming, far from intelligent - I sometimes wonder what redeeming quality these despicable frogs could have to endear themselves to the ladies!

Hell, the cheating frog Fiona once dated? Even I look better - and that's not saying much, believe me. Amazed me that Fiona would even deign to speak to such an adulterous specimen. I was incredulous. Yet according to popular report, that particular frog seems to have left dozens of broken female hearts strewn all over the swamp. Even managed to find a scullery maid to serenade with his croaks whilst carousing with Fiona.

Maybe that frog purchased an irresistible love potion. Maybe he had a particular enchanting lily pad.

Or maybe the damsels love a Fear Factor challenge.

Whatever it is... dammit to hell it seriously makes me wanna swing straight! Seems to me that breeder boys do have it easy when it comes to love. Gay princes certainly wouldn't sully themselves with abominable mudcritters ( what a mess it would make on their tunics! ) but it seems as if the pampered princesses don't have any such squeamish qualms when it comes to slimy suitors.

If frogs can have such a good deal on land, surely I could land a princess or two myself. :)