Tale of Charming Calvin & the Poison Ivy

Oh, the weather outside is frightful but the fire is so delightful.

And since we've no place to go, come closer, lil children, come near and listen to this cold winter's tale of bitter betrayal and love lost.

Once upon a time in a land far, far away, there lived a boy in a city. Just a simple boy, nothing very much special about him at all. A boy who pined for his laddie-love, Calvin. A certain charming soul ensnared by the wicked machinations of the wily Homosexoil Monarch who had captured him one bright midsummer's day only to have him transported to an enchanted, wintry capital far away in the frozen wastes of the north.

A place ( one had only heard in picture books and fairy tales! ) where walls were painted red as blood, the streets were paved in silvery sleet and the people spoke in foreign devil tongues full of chings and chongs.



Wishin and hopin
And thinkin and prayin
But a solemn promise was made by the Monarch to allow Calvin's return when the seasons finally changed - when the cold hand of frost touched the gleaming spires of the capital.

The boy had to be pleased with the seasonal arrangement since winter solstice seemed not too far away. And he began to make plans for Calvin's imminent return.

Till unbeknownst to the boy, a certain femme fatale by the name of Poison Ivy alighted on the capital weeks before winter came along to bewitch the heart of the faithless Calvin! Armed with her broomstick, her cauldron and her tempting brochure of travel trips, Poison Ivy knew exactly how to enslave the gullible Calvin to her every whim! To the lonesome Calvin pining for home, the clever witch all clad in green whispered promises of an eternal summer with sun-kissed beaches, endless azure waves and magical carpet rides in the land down under she called the Gold Coast.

Far from thinking of the ones he left back home and the boy left to fade with the coming cold, Calvin was swayed by her wicked wiles.

And thus was the boy betrayed and love lost.

Summer kisses, winter tears. Not every fairy tale ends in a happily ever after.


...***...

Though there might be a trip to Morocco instead of Brisbane if the boy has his way ( and of course manages to break the cunning spell cast by his new nemesis Poison Ivy ). Come on, we already have plenty of sun, sand and sea. What about the exotic bazaars of Marrakesh instead?

Still... to continue in Christmassy spirit of the tale...