Monday, December 03, 2007

Bi Now Gay Later

Are you gay?

Or are you straight?

Or is there even such a thing?

For me, sexuality is a fluid thing. I don't think anyone's 100% heterosexual or 100% homosexual.

Rarely do you find such a thing. Like most folks on the Kinsey scale, I think we all veer from one end of the scale to the other depending on the situation - and of course, the person we're with. I'm hardly going to confine myself to being steadfastly homosexual forever. Why stick myself in that small-minded box?

Who knows, I could meet this wonderful person out there who's a combination of every personality trait I admire and love - have just the right connection and chemistry - and BANG. Just like that, we're in love. The big L like the one every schmaltzy poet and artist has been trying to convey since men started walking upright and doodling on cave walls. I'm hardly going to dump that person just because she possesses the wrong genitals, am I? Would be rather silly and thoughtless of me to throw a gem away just because it doesn't match the stringent criteria I have locked in my head! I'm pretty smart. If that unlikelihood ever happens, I'm sure ( human anatomy studies aside ) I'll figure my way around a hoo hoo one day.

I might need a manual though. With crudely drawn stick figures possibly.

Though at the moment I think I'll stick to the dicks. Let's face it, boys are easier to love.

Women. Well, women are a tad more complicated.

Ananda Everingham
Pondering?

So imagine Tan's confusion when he surfaces from a traumatic amnesia and finds himself falling for a winsome girl ( who ostensibly ran him down ) named Oom. Simple enough premise for Me... Myself, one that's been replayed a thousand times onscreen and yet there's a tragic twist to this timeworn tale. Tan has a secret - in his checkered past, he was actually a showstopper drag queen with a married man on the side. Jaunty Jared - that man with the vaguely schizophrenic taste in movies veering from screamin nightmarish horror to weepy sentmental tales - has been recommending this movie forever and it's only today that I took the time to finish it.

Who could blame Oom for falling for Tan - even after discovering his sordid beginnings? Played by Ananda Everingham, not only does the stubbled thai god look supremely hot in jeans, he also looks pretty good in a smile and a teensy bowl to cover up the goods. Have I mentioned that the man's a delicious domestic god on the side as well! Small wonder Oom's all distraught at losing him.

Hell, I'm thinking of running down handsome guys in dark alleys and dragging them home as well ( the modern version of clubbing them and dragging them by the hair back to the cave ). Fortunately Tan has a ponytail just perfect for the job.

10 comments:

Emo-Happiness said...

Dear Savante,

Would like to write to you.
May I have your email?
......
this is emotioneel.
emotioneel.blogspot.com

Janvier said...

LOL the post title had us in stitches! And we thought it had something to do with Christmas shopping!

poof said...

yeah
versatility rocks!
why have just one side of the world?

Jake said...

haha i've actually thought about it this a couple times. My best friend Elise, I'm basically in love with her. But it's not sexual at all. But I'm gay and a guy fulfills all my wants. But i agree with you on what you said about 100% one thing, I think everyone lies close to one end or the other but not completely.

ernloy said...

i once got scolded when i mentioned i would like to taste a bit of both sides...reason is why so GREEDY??? =.="

A Lewis said...

I hate to tell you, but I'm definitely 100% gay. Tried to not be, but it wasn't working....at all or in the least. Me lovin' the weenie!

Jason said...

Ergh... I don't fancy boobies. They're just not hard enough. :P

Unknown said...

tamak nye :p

Crazy Sam said...

I don't fancy boobies either. May be I will be able to love her, but what happens when it comes to sex? Though sex is not everything, it becomes a big issue for the lack of it.

savante said...

No prob, it's at the top link, emotioneel.

Can't claim ownership of the phrase! It's famez, janvier.

See what gauzzel said :P

Whoa. THought about it a couple times, jake?

True, it's a bit greedy to want the best of both worlds, ernloy :P But so what!

So am I, lewis.

Unless they have silicone in them, jason.

True enough, soloact.

Takes a while but I'm sure you can get used to them, sam.

Paul