Friday, March 09, 2007

Tits and Cleavage II

Had an interesting comment in my last post where I talked about seemingly straight boys stumbling hopelessly over compliments when it comes to each other. Always talking about gay men approaching straight guys with devastating consequences ( homophobic bloodbath anyone? ) so what if we actually turned it around?

Boys and Girls
Girls who are boys
Who like boys to be girls
Who do boys like theyre girls
Who do girls like theyre boys!

Simple enough actually. I think we all know what I would do if a girl asked me out on a date... honestly I'd usually say hell yeah, why not. Not that I'm turning fashionably pansexual but hey... nice meal, good conversation, hopefully pleasant company. It's all good. Don't think that human sexuality's all set in stone so with the right buttons being pushed, who knows that she could actually convert me. Actually lead me back to the path of righteousness so to speak.

Or at least she could try :P

Lord knows I'm certainly not a misogynist and I think women are simply fabulous creatures ( come on, multitasking and shopping? What's not to love! ) - so I don't believe that it would be too far a leap to actually falling in love with them.

Then again, going all ga-ga like my drooling breeder brothers over their bouncing hoo hooss and their bodacious ta tas could be a significant problem ( let's not even talk about their hoochie coochies ). Sure, I notice them. Who doesn't? When you've got a significant rack jutting out a mile wide, I think even a blind pedophiliac priest would notice.

Of course sometimes I do more than just check them out aesthetically ( which is all I wanna do, I swear! ).

Paul : Whoa. Check out that rack!
Calvin : That's a girl.
Paul : So? Impressive. Dang, they're certainly not small and humble - and God knows I'm gonna confuse them with mountains.
Calvin : Huh.

Or something like that. My staid, politically-correct man, Charming Calvin disapproves of course. Not sure why though since after all if you have ta tas off the chain, I think that's a reason to celebrate, don'tcha think? Certainly boys with tits and cleavage find all sorts of opportunities for display :)

But answering ryan's comments, same goes for that open-minded straight bloke.

Straight Bloke : I'd so go out with you if I was gay.
Paul : Not a problem. You can pretend. So can I. Man dates are fine by me.
Straight Bloke : Gah.

See. I am flexible.

12 comments:

Stephen said...

The nice meal, pleasant conversation, shopping date you describe does sound nice.

Certainly nicer than having some woman at your local pub bouncing up and down on your knee, running her hands around inside your shirt and trying to snog you (shudders...) :(

As for breasts - sorry, lost interest when I started eating solid food.

Melvin Mah said...

Cheers for flexibility..~ =)

Anonymous said...

Well I do admire breasts that are on the right proportion but a larger one is not that really flattering. I always like the boobs the models have!

confusticated said...

yay for flexibility indded. only problem is, the boyfriend doesn't appreciate ogling of the other gender because he can't participate.

Anonymous said...

"flexible"? Oh you mean, versatile? hehe.

Allan Yap & Nigel A. Skelchy said...

Paul ah, have I told you that you're a really good writer. Your use of language paints a picture in people's minds. The pacing is good and you get right to the heart of the matter. To cut a long story short, you're good reading mate. Keep it up! ;-)

Nigel

PS "Dates" are always fun. Boy or girl.

Anonymous said...

i enjoyed reading your cny story between john and james sung.
i really like your style,
but i cant access chapters 3 and so on. :(
can you rectify the problem?
i am hooked :(

sereneannabelle said...

i mean, girls look at girls too! we admire each other's assets, and although there's nothing much to compare except let's say youre talking about abs on a sporty girl...

i think it's ok to admire even when ure not interested. =)

hrugaar said...

You can pretend. So can I. LOL! Love it! :oD

I agree with Stephen though ... shopping date, cool ... being groped by drunken tart down the pub, no thanks la.

savante said...

Damn, stephen and ru, didn't think about being snogged in the bar by a woman. But I think that's okay :P

Oh yeah, I cheer for that everyday, m5lvin.

True enough. Just the right size, chase.

yeah, the bf finds it a bit disconcerting, confusticated.

Meant both, connerkent :)

Thanks, nigel!

Will get that done soon enough. Glad you liked it, shadower.

And you know you look fab don'tcha, goodshithappens!

Paul

William said...

If it's hanging out for all the world to see, heck yeah, I would take a second glance for the novelty factor.

RRP said...

lmao! i'll use that one next time. thanks for the tip, paul. ;)