Or so they tell me.
In real life, it's far from the truth - since everyone else assumes the above despite what the oblivious bachelor might claim. Have you ever noticed that in the office, unwanted odd jobs and irksome duties are usually assigned to the unfortunate singletons? Last minute meetings and unprecedented events, sudden unforeseen weekend on-calls and dreadfully dull courses.
Colleague : Oh, there's this lecture on Saturday.
Paul : Yeah. So there is!
Colleague : Hey, you can do it. You're not married mah.
Paul : True. And I'm unlikely to be married if my social life keeps getting stunted by my work.
I know. I can get quite nasty at work too. Still I managed to get my point across ( leaving my poor colleague agog ) which leaves me free this weekend to write this. Sure I believe the duties of a family man bears more weight but that doesn't mean I, being the single guy, should be the unfortunate scapegoat each time some menial task is set upon us.
And that's not the end of it. Somehow or rather it seems as if the seemingly single, carefree bachelor / spinster is usually the one dumped upon with a heap of irksome family responsibilities stemming from a motley assortment of indigent, largely inept relatives - usually ranging from simple tasks such as running simple errands for them to far more complex labours such as dropping by for infrequent home visits / medical check-ups and arranging transport from A to B.
My brother, fortunate man that he is, manages to escape such unwanted attention by happily providing the clan with two hopeful offspring while I'm still the shockingly single son. Said unmarried state obviously making me amenable to all sorts of unreasonable demands from playing indignified emergency chauffeur to last-minute dinner date material.
Mom : Are you free tomorrow evening?
Paul : I should think so. Don't have anything planned just yet.
Mom : I think you have to go pick up Aunt DimWit Della who's finishing her checkup in the hospital.
Paul : Me? What about my brother?
Mom : He's got a family to think of.
Paul : And obviously I think of nothing.
Mom : She's your auntie mah.
Paul : And there are amazing technological inventions called taxis that provide transport which she can well afford.
Mom : She says they are dangerous.
Paul : Sure, it's like a pleasure drive through war-torn Iraq.
Yeah, pull out the yellow guilt card. Like anyone's gonna try putting the moves on the far from desirable Aunt DimWit Della. Not sure why she keeps calling me though since she knows she's gonna end up the unwilling barb of my acerbic jokes.
Demands I don't mind fulfilling!
Sigh. Although it doesn't sound like it at the moment, I actually do love my super-sized family, no doubt about that. I don't think anyone else makes such an effort to remain in contact with their numerous relatives around - including far-flung, unheard-of third cousins. Believe that blood is actually thicker than water.
But that doesn't make me the fall guy of the family, does it?
Actually makes me feel like flying out to Hanoi, engaging the attentions of a ravishing, fertile Vietnamese bride and start procreating like rabbits just to escape the attention. Maybe then they'll start hounding my younger unmarried cousins. :P