Monday, June 18, 2007

The Anniversary

Surprisingly enough one of the first things people ask about when you're a couple is the anniversary. Ask me anything else and I might have a glib reply ready from my arsenal but I find myself haplessly ill-equipped and stumped with this particular query. With Charming Calvin and myself, I believe it's been about a year now but I could be wrong about that.

Stranger : So how long have you guys been together?
Paul : Together? A year?
Calvin : 13 months?
Paul : Maybe 10 months.
Calvin : But then we met at the...
Paul : But then there was that time...

You can see where I'm going with this.

Huh
Now what day was that again?!

With my approaching senility I'm not at all great with dates ( I swear if I didn't have my birthdate clearly stated on my ID, I'd probably forget it ) but tell me, where would you place the date of the anniversary? The day you first met? The day you first went out on a date? The day you got your hands in his pants? The day he finally gave you his apartment key?

Hmm... I do have the day we first met noted in the blog however so that helps.

Straight couples have it easy that way. Dates and occasions, anniversaries and memorial days have all been written in stone ever since Adam and Eve had that first arranged marriage under the Tree of Life with the Devil standing in as best man / maid of honour. Subsequently everyone else had it easier after the first registered heterosexual couple worked through the kinks of married life.

Delilah knew Samson would delight in several seashell hairclips before his infamous haircut. Even without his bureaucratic Roman aides reminding him, Antony knew exactly when to buy Cleopatra that enclasped golden snakehead pendant - or else her beloved pet asps would soon find themselves heading for his side of the marital bed. Romeo - if he hadn't succumbed to poison - knew exactly when to compose an ode to his winsome Juliet's lovely locks.

Usually there's a particular day. The beginning of a courtship. The fateful moving in day ( or elope as it may ). The wedding day. A day that's marked down in deep signal red on the calendar threatening swift retribution if celebrations aren't held on that particular day with appropriate reverent gifts of tribute.

I don't have that calendar. Neither does Calvin - but then who'd be able to find a calendar in the mess that is his apartment? :P

Somehow or rather Charming Calvin and I somehow segued imperceptibly from being casual friends to being a couple without actually realizing it since it happened so naturally. From holding his cellphone number to holding hands to holding that bottle of lube, it all happened in homosexual miliseconds. Perhaps we should have seen fit to place a marker on each day but honestly it never occurred to me while we were seeing each other that there'd be a need for relationship milestones later.

Calvin would say he didn't think it'd last - hence he saw no apparent need to recall significant dates - but I guess we proved his pessimistic predictions wrong. :P

Maybe we should just pick a day and be done with it.

28 comments:

Janvier said...

Seamlessly from one state to another? No popping the question? No sealing in stone, or signing in blood? :)

Anonymous said...

aww.... honey sweet post from the doc :)

for me, it is the first kiss... yeah, definately the first kiss

JL said...

tak kisah lah...

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!

matrianklw said...

Lube? Hmmm... =) Happy Anniversary anyway!

William said...

For me it's the day he asked, "Do you like me?" and I nodded a positive.

closetalk said...

mmm... the adte u first met. without a doubt. period. finito. :)

and congrats. :):):)

Dave said...

Oh my god. Couldn't believe that you actually forget your birthday.

To me, birthday is more important than anything else. It marks the day you arrive in this world, and the pain the child's mother brings you.

Do give mum a big slice of cake to thank her for the pain she goes through for bringing you into this world. :)

Vengelyne said...

Erm... Happy Anniversary, whenever that is. =)

Mine would be the day he starts holding my hands and I don't push him away. Haha. I'm a conservative nun when I'm single. Yeah.

Sue said...

My husband and I go through this every year. We cannot remember our wedding anniversary. We both know we were married on June 15, but what year? Was it 1985 or 1986? We go through this every year. This year we figured it out again that it was 1985. It is so embarrassing. How do we keep forgetting it? See, and we heterosexuals, and still we have this problem. Maybe we are both senile? What do you think Dr. Paul? As for remembering other dates, such as the year we met, first date, etc, you can forget it.

coolgardy said...

Happy Anniversary...and many more years to come...

dazzakoh said...

Since my bf and I somehow just segued from first lunch.. to .. whatever it was the doc mentioned.. we date it from the first physical meeting...

dazzakoh said...

...and yes, doc, choose a date, and declare it "Happy Anniversary!" day..

Have a good one!

Cyclohelix said...

Grats & Many More To Cum!

Fable Frog said...

you're so right~!! there're no declaration or proposal etc~ it just happen and there's no actual date for it~ for me, as long remember the first movie together, the first restaurant etc is enough la~ the date is rather not so important~~ ;) coz' i'm not good with numbers~

Mark said...

Has it been that long? Wow. Happy anniversary, if that's coming up any time soon. Btw, love the phrase "homosexual milliseconds." Could be the new buzzword. :-)

strapping.shane said...

Time flies doesn't it? :)

Well, happy anniversary kor - whenever that is! :P

Musang said...

the first official date.

yup.

and happy anniversary to u and calv... semoga berbahagia hingga ke anak cucu.

:P

Annie said...

I consider my husband's and my anniverary to be the day we actually "met".. July 5th. We became acquaintances, then penpals, then friends.. and so on. I'd like to think when a person enters your life no matter what capacity, it makes an impact.
Poor Calvin *slapping Calvin upside the head*.. thought it wouldn't last. Well, yanno, with those doctors and the ungodly hours... one can be pessimistic.. but we're talking about PAUL! Paul is different. He just is.

Congrats you two! No matter about dates, I say just be happy you're still together and enjoying each other's company!

Dashing Dan said...

Yay, mushy post! *cheers*

Happy anniversary doc. :)

connerkent said...

happy anniversary to calvin and paul! :D

charming.calvin said...

No popping the question, not sure when was the first kiss, no "Do you like me" question, don't know when he first held my hand, not sure which was the first official date, so how?

That leaves only one. Go find when we first met.

kon kon said...

happy anniversary!! whenever that date is..

it'll be nice to figure out one (or pick one if you can't decide) specific date so you guys would not have to question year after year or even tell people different dates if they asked :p

East-West said...

Happy Anniversary ....

We knew the extact time/date/place we met ..... 730pm 30th July 1983, just outside the old CK Tang in Singapore :-)

jay said...

I say celebrate them all, once you remember them anyways. :)

Kent said...

Oh well, there could be numerous occassions that can be celebrated, they day you guys first met, the day you got steady officially, the day of your first kiss, of course the day you first hold the lube and more...

For me and bf, it is the day we first met, and the day I poped the question "Are we going steady?"

Happy Anniversary and sharing with you guys a wonderful phrase that I came across:

"Two lives, two hearts, joined together in friendship, united forever in love"

-C said...

I'm not sure why the date is so significant. I mean sure it's nice to be able to point to a spot in time and go 'here is where it started'. I'm reminded of those people who have amnesia, or never knew their parents. They essentially pick a birthday. I don't think it's altogether so terrible a crime. Some might ritualize the entire process but I think the dates are not the important bits.

Ryan said...

Yeah we were lazy too, so we just chose 1st of Nov, which is so easy to remember! Coz the first time I asked for his devotion he rejected, so I don't think that'd be suitable.

Plus, I forgot when I asked him :P

Happy Anniversary!

Jaded Jeremy said...

Happy Anniversary! So happy for you two. We definitely have to catch up before I go back to work.