Friday, October 06, 2006

The Devil's Protege

After last night, I have developed a new goal in life.

Forget all about wallpapering and reupholstering the sofa. Forget about CPR and saving lives in the hospital. Forget about the coming exams that are giving me a minor migraine and major ulcers.

It's obvious that I have been going at it the wrong way!

All I wanna do now is get fabulous slinky Jimmy Choos, overly large grandma-like Chanel shades, tailored designer jackets that look like a million bucks and a subtle purse to the lips that would sink a promising fashion collection to the forgotten depths of obscurity. And then after work, help out with the charities by handing out spectacular freebies like Bang & Olufsen designer cellphones and Marc Jacobs slingbags to all my envious, drooling cronies before leaving for a spectacular society gala. Then go home to a delicious young journalist who greets me at the door dressed only in the latest unpublished manuscript from JK Rowling.

Sigh. Like Thursday's child, I still have very far to go.

Training out!
Starting to get tough!

It is obvious that I'm far from the wicked witch from the west that I aspire to be - and hard, rigorous training is needed to achieve the heights of greatness that house the disreputable likes of Miranda Priestley. Come to think about it, for a she-devil in Prada like her, possibly the deepest bowels of hell.

Come on, it's obvious enough that being a charming do-gooder doesn't score me that amazing brownstone mansion in Park Avenue nor does it get me fabulous goodies like Versace jackets and Ferragamo pumps. Time enough to make a change. Since I've already been tarred and feathered for being wicked, I might as well play the role to the evil hilt. So from tomorrow onwards, I shall have to perfect that particularly chilly tone with the whispery diction as perfect as my ramrod straight posture just enough to excoriate the next unfortunate incompetent that comes my way and make them cry all the way home to their mamas. Scurry, ya little interns, if you know what's good for ya. Listen to the strut of my big bad Italian leather boots and shiver.

Oh yeah and I'll have to stop eating ( or drink blah cucumber / alfalfa leaf juices in place of regular meals ) just to fit in the designer stick-thin clothes I'll be receiving once I commence work on Runway.


matrianklw said...

WHo is that in the pic, paul? Is it Benjamin McKenzie? And if it is, which movie is that from? The O.C.?

nyonyapenang said...

willing to give up dimsum, huh?

Anonymous said...

Dr, you still need to work hard to fit the size 4... not even the size 6... :P

Jay said...

Go on, release the inner glam in you!

Las montaƱas said...

ncan alfafa juices do a 29 inch waist? if so, i wan!

ikanbilis said...

someone is really determiend to be the boss of Runaway! any free post for junior assistant?

William said...

Miranda Priestley / Cruella DeVil ??

Annie said...

Simply mind boggling... How come Jay's hair keep changing like that?

*wheeze* *wheeze* I can't breathe Paul, I'm slumping over, I'm.. I'm... my chest hurts.. I'm having a cardiac arrest... Oh, crap.. I forgot, you're giving up CPR..

FINE THEN! Let me die

canardbidon said...

ya! who's that in the pic! i demand to know!! hehe

coolgardy said...

Devil Wears Prada is simply outstanding...I just love the colors and everything associated with it. :)

pluboy@takashi said...

hey dude..!! wow.. its been sometime since i last came here.. anyway i added ur link to mine.. so that i wont get lost coming here again ehhehe!!!!

Gay boy comes to London said...

Oh, don't forget the whip. Miranda didn't have 1, but you can, ha.

savante said...

Yeah, Matt and canard, it is Benjamin McKenzie from the new episode of OC. Who knows, maybe since Marisa died, he has decided to turn gay boxer.

Oh. It's so difficult, nyonya.

Don't remind me, apollo!

Yeah, that will take a few decades, jay.

Who knows. IT might be gross enough that nothing tastes good enough, las montanas.

Yes, you can be the junior assistant, ikanbilis. Go fetch me some latte. Hot.

More Devil, william.

I'll get the assistant to give you a quick defib, annie.

coolgardy, fFabulous dresses!!

Thanks, pluboy!

The whip. Mmm.... good idea, gayboy.


R*Y A N said...

i started getting into the skinny jeans and cardigans (albeit fashionable ones) partly because of this movie... and plus, cos i wanna look fab! ;)

what would your fav outfit be, paul?