How do you actually find someone in a small town?
Just walking about keeping my eyes peeled for gay men doesn't work since it isn't actually that easy picking them out from the rest of the straight herd. Gay-dar sounds great in writing but it doesn't actually work that great in reality. Looking for guys in my workplace comes up to the same thing since we don't exactly wear our pink hearts on our sleeves for everyone to see - well, except for my rainbow flag pin. :) Unlike more liberal societies, Malaysian men don't exactly advertise their sexuality out in the open.
The obvious would be searching at the various gay hangouts in town. Unfortunately in my small place, there are none that I know of. Hanging out in dark, mosquito-infested public parks doesn't sound like a particularly inviting choice - especially since it seems to be sending out the totally wrong signals.
Recently, inspired by the various online romances I have heard about, I have placed several ads here and there - setting out hopefully seductive lures hoping that the big fish ( or at least the right one ) would take the bait. Tiny nibbles here and there but I haven't been pulled over by a shark yet.
I guess this is all a reiteration of sorts since I have griped about my situation before. Got all these thoughts swirling around since I just returned from a date tonight. And hell ( you can judge by the time I'm writing this ) obviously I still didn't get a spark - and I doubt I gave off any either :)
My ISO would yell at me if he knew I was getting all maudlin like this but it is getting quite disheartening sometimes - especially since I've been receiving so many wedding invitations from some of my lucky peers. Damn it, I am jealous! :) Like the proverbial homosexual Bridget Jones, the pressure is getting to me, I guess - especially with the big 30 looming in the next few years.
So, small town gay boys... what do you do?
12 comments:
For one, small town gay boy goes to, in your case, KL to party and hook up, and maybe they meet someone from the small home town.
That is one way it's done world wide.
Is ISO the only gay man you know in town? If not, one friend introduce you to an other and so on. Also done world wide.. :)
How about a weekend in KL, Jay alredy gave a recent update on the nature of several places? And I remember you don't like the club scen, but the chance of dream boy coming calling at your home unannounced is slim, pretty slim.. ;)
I know. I know. I do that once in a while - hence the comment on Jay's page that I was dancing about in Liquid too.
In Malacca... well noy, my ISO isn't the only gay man I know. And he isn't exactly here anymore - comes down on weekends. I mentioned dates... well, there are other gay men around and I'm searching. Planning to meet another one on Tuesday/Wednesday.
Paul
I knew you knew that already Paul, I just got overwhelmed by un urge to say it (again) ;P
Maybe you should not be looking, but just be in gay environments, and give someone a chance to find you?
So why was YY sweating so hard?
I can't take credit for sending you to Tokyo, but I really like to read the blog afterwards. :)
I totally agree with everyone else here. The answer seems to be that small town boys who want to get laid ought to move to big towns.
I understand that it seems a bit... hungry to quit your job and sell your home and all that just for hot fuck-me-like-you-hate-me slutty mansex. But if you think of it as looking for 'love' then it makes you more of a romantic.
Oh hang on, you ARE looking for love. Whoops, my bad.
well consider yourself lucky...if you dont seem to find any available gay guys in your town you just move to a bigger town..now in my case if theres no available gay guy here what am i to do?? i live on an island in the middle of the frickin indian ocean!!now do you understand why im going to study in london?? hint!hint!! lol!! theres got to be someone there!!
I am a small town Malaysian boy and I found that moving to KL is the solution or maybe just weekend trips...
But sometimes it's hard to get some action in the big city also...
Well, I am somewhat romantic so looking for love sounds more the thing but hey, that doesn't mean I wouldn't mind some hot fuck-me-like-you-hate-me slutty mansex.
Paul
I live in a town of about 7,500. So mosly I just beat off a lot! :-)
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