Thursday, January 19, 2006

Mixed signals

There are times when I feel my gay-dar has gone on a permanent fritz - and it's perfectly evident when it comes to someone like Big Bicep Barry. Perhaps blind-sided by his eminently mountainous pectorals, I've simply become a really bad judge of his gayness factor.

But every now and then, I get just the right mix of gay signals from a passing stranger and my gay-dar runs amok.... A late tutorial yesterday had me flabbergasted as I found myself overwhelmed by the twenty foot tsunami-waves of fabulousness coming from the speaker. Perfect cheekbones and shiny smile. Perfectly coiffed ( with a hundred dollar haircut, I'm sure ) and perfectly attired in a ribs-hugging snazzy shirt and tie with to-die-for cufflinks. Naughty Nurse was just the perfect gay clone from the tips of his softly highlighted hair to his spit-shined shoes.

I hated his gay perfection on principle - although I was wearing the most amazing cream-coloured tie that none of his shiny cufflinks could possibly beat.

CuddlingObviously my gay-dar was up and running - and it didn't take long for me to send messages to Handsome Hui who was listening to the same dull lecture. Not only did he totally disregard my warning, he gave me a saucy wink before drawing the Naughty Nurse aside after the talk for a word.

Sending me a taunt only serves to make my wicked self come to life. Just as the skanky, shamelessly flirting duo were about to exchange their numbers, I made my move. No one to give up that easily, I walked up to Hui and practically outed myself to everyone - and the Naughty Nurse - by placing my arm around his waist ( even gave a quick pinch to his nipple ) and whispering, "We've got to go, darlin."

Naughty Nurse jumped a mile as I gave him a frozen stare worthy of the incomparable Gong Li herself. What the hell possessed me?

Still it was kinda fun seeing Handsome Hui's jaw drop straight to the floor. Doubt he'll ever double dare me again.

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

hilarious! your gay-dar must have been beeping like crazy!

Anonymous said...

Now THAT's funny....You certainly got the best of HH with that one! :)

Anonymous said...

It's survival of the fittest that possessed you! Maybe it's the right time to go out and have more fun and who knows - you'll find the ONE! Gaydar is still working - that's handy!

savante said...

It was beeping like crazy, designdoc. He was sooo gay!

Brian, he was flabbergasted.

Well, ian, now I have to test my newly functioning gaydar with everyone else.

Paul

MrBunnyBan said...

Meh, it's not the problem with the gaydar. Some people are just designed like stealth fighters. -.-

That was really cool though. I don't care if it earned you stares. Tee hee!

Anonymous said...

Now you're talkin' and smokin'! LOL

CTG said...

Good one buddy. Your gaydar must be in top form. At least you have gaydar - I can't tell, only if it's very obvious. I also fly way below gaydar, lol. Good one and I can imagine the look on HH's face. Hilarious! I've had a few lecturers in my student days that, while they weren't gay, they were gorgeous. Have a good one. Take care, CTG.

Curtis said...

Wicked thing to do. I love it!

Petie said...

Aren't you a riot :) I wondered if Hui will dare to be anywhere near you again...

I wondered if this will start a rumor mills amoung the nurses.

Joe said...

I'm sorry, but anyone who uses a photo of Nip/Tuck on the header of their site gets an IMMEDIATE link to mine.

Very much looking forward to getting to know you better and to reading about all of your gay adventures!

hrugaar said...

Paul, you beauty! :oD I bet Hui enjoyed it more than he let on, too.

Maybe you should try that arm-around-the-waist move with BBB. I figure it's worth the odd bruise here and there. ;o)

hrugaar said...

Oh yeah, was the cream-coloured tie the gift from Leggie?

jjd said...

oh my oh my! saucy indeed! what was his reaction after that?!?!!

Anonymous said...

:)
nice post

ça va pas la tête said...

Wicked! Wicked.! hehehe ;)

Anonymous said...

wa...damn wicked.

congrat on the fully utilisation of your gaydar. i believe it work beyond it full capacity based on what you wrote down..

can't wait to hear the upcoming rumours about this indecent behaviour of yours ;)

Anonymous said...

Hiya,

Just wanna drop a short note and say thanks 4 a hillarious post! U just put a smile on my face and made my day ;-)

In case u ever wanna change vocation and become a writer, do let us know cos I bet there's going 2 b long queue at the book premier. Ciao.

Derek said...

Oooh, that was very daring of you ...

But if i were you, I would have gotten the his number as well. Which I am sur e you did. ;P

Squido said...

I'm prettu sure your gay-dar is working well. Some just like to fly below the radar like someone i know.

I think it's time for you to develop a newer gay-dar to detect them ;)

savante said...

Built like stealth fighter :) I love that, Daniel. Yeah, that's what Barry looks like actually.

Hardly smokin.. it was just a hand around the waist. It would have been smokin if I'd planted a wet one :)

ctg, what great lecturers! Hot too? I am jealous. We only had old, crusty professors... hardly endearing.

Thanks, Curtis.

Pete, haven't gone near Hui yet today but we'll see how it goes tomorrow.

Another Nip/Tuck fan! I love ya, Joe.

Ru, yeah, the tie was from Leggie and I love it :) Doubt Barry would seriously bruise me since I can be quite the monster.

Hey, Charles. I'm gonna put up a link!

Wicked, ca va.. and so unlike me :P

Well, pakcik, you did tell me to be a lil more proactive.

nikiboy, I do want to change my vocation. Get me a book deal!

Daring? Not psychotic as I thought, Derek? Nah, not interested in Naughty Nurse.. he looks a lil high maintenance.

Develop a new gay dar? My old one's obviously not ready to be to be traded.

Paul

Alex said...

Hahahaha.... you're the naughty one! Maybe HH will make a more daring challenge next time!