Easy enough for me since I know hardly anyone's gonna miscontrue my particularly coquettish behaviour. Hell the handsome beaus I banter with certainly wouldn't even give me the time of day had they not been stuck in that particular serendipitous situation with me.
Umm.. hi.. you flirting with me?
So today I flirted with the personable nutritionist at the pharmacy. There's nothing quite like being friendly, is there? It's an accomplishment you pick up rather quickly when you have the unenviable looks of an unsightly hobbit. Pretty boys just have to stand there for folks to like them after all :)
Lesson to flirting? Just a quick smile as an introduction ( with just a hint of amorous come-hither ) then offer that quick two-second favourable once-over. What my ISO used to call my instant strip X-ray vision - since it tends to leave the unhappy prey feeling naked and vulnerable under my relentless scrutiny. I'll admit my gaze tends to linger on certain... attractive portions.
This rough-and-ready technique fails occasionally especially with the tough hardcore but today, as a welcome reward, the man returned the compliment by holding my glance for a full five minutes. Then came that slow beguiling smile with a hint of dimples bracketing the toothy smile.
Could he be anymore gay?
People always wonder how our vaunted gay-dar sometimes works - and how we don't hit on the wrong guys by accident all the time ( the occasional violent mishap does occur but practice does make perfect! ). Easy enough I'd say. I mean straight guys given such a thorough examination would either balk or throw a punch in a fit of gay panic - which is why one of the earliest skills a growing homo learns is to run. Fast. Kinda like Forrest Gump. Very few heterosexuals would submit to such a conspicuous sexual overture after all.
And let's face it, only a gay man would look into another man's eyes for more than a minute without flinching. Short of being a practiced hypnotist.
Go try it.
But learn how to run first.
9 comments:
Or, you could just be like me....FLIRT, KEEP STARING, and DON'T RUN. Just see what happens. It's always interesting.
lewis is rite. 1 min aint enuf. hope 2 b forever. :P
LOL
its pretty scary to keep staring man
Look longer than a 10 secs = stare
i have a very weak stare
=(
Never try, never know eh? Heheheh.
Goodie, something to do in the LRTs. :P
I'm the one who flinch most the time...
You're a hobbit Paul? I always thought of you as the wise Gandolf. No matter. You're just a short Gandolf then? with floppy feet.
That smile thing does work but my problem is keeping eye contact. I could never win a staring contest. It takes too much confidence to stare back at somebody. I'm glad you'll be keeping up with your hamstring exercises - it's very much needed when doing sprints from possible violent situations.
If you were near me, you could teach me to stare properly.
I love that.... lemme try it next time!
"But learn how to run first."
But but but...I have knee and foot problem. How to run leh?
I also have flinching problem. Think 3 secs of staring the most.
But American boys are big and strong! I could get beaten up if I don't run, lewis :P
2 mins :) A bit too long, koala!
Practice in the mirror, gauzzel.
Just make sure you get ready to run, queer rant.
Why flinch, jason?
Floppy feet! Muahaha :) Yeah, anniieiee...
Just make sure Jin is nearby to recuse you, alex.
Hobble faster, jeremy!
Paul
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