Thursday, February 22, 2007

Pimp my Ride

You know what, I think I know what to get for my next vehicle.

Not only must it be big, black and bulky - capable of running small inconsequential gnats off the road and scaring the living daylights out of terrified pedestrians kinda like Big Bicep Barry's Black Bruiser - it must also have a helluva ginormous back seat spacious enough to host the entire marine platoon.

Learnt my lesson today when I finally had a chance to get into Jaunty Jared's Jumping Jalopy.

Baby, it was like stepping into a pimped ride, seriously. If there was a hip happening homo version of Pimp my Ride of course. Think fluffy pillows and plush seats for the interior, decor and entertainment magazines littering the extendable back for entertainment and thumpa thumpa house music in the background. Honestly, it was like stepping into a gay disco without the distracting smoke and booze - and ( unfortunately! ) without the fifty shirtless gay boys in body glitter gyrating their sexy stuff on the dancefloor.

Hopin and wishin
Come check out my backseat...

But then Jared's Jumping Jalopy had a backseat large enough to accomodate quite a number of those sweaty hotties actually - as I'm sure Jared has had the opportunity to test out that particular salacious theory :P

No doubt Charming Calvin and I were reluctantly intrigued by the appropriately named Pimpmobile. And certainly game enough to give the backseat a try.

Unfortunately I forgot to warn him that it's also backbreaking, hell on the knees and best left to raging oversexed teenage hormones. :)


jase said...

and here i thought when you said great seat, I'd thought you say on your lap..:p

joshua said...

you wild thing you!

strapping.shane said...

JARED, not Jerrod.

Honestly, never even heard of such a name!!!

hrugaar said...

I love cars that are spiritually trucks, those big 4wd off-roaders and all.

Unfortunately they're not too practical on a rock as small as ours (not that that stops a lot of people from owning them, especially young mothers barging other folk off the road as they speed to collect their offspring from school).

m5lvin said...

I don't know how true is this but I heard it from someone that there is a research asserting that the reason guys love big bulky cars is to compensate for their small lil bro (penis)....I wonder how true is that...