Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Screwdrivers and Hammers

With the malls already awash with sentimental hearts, candy and teddies, even the most oblivious soul would know that the much dreaded V-Day is fast approaching ( tomorrow actually ). Since the ill-fated Saint Valentine's long dead and buried, can't tell whether he'd be chock-pleased over the fact that his special day has been turned into a commercialized hearts-and-flowers extravaganza - or whether he'd be revolted by the diabetic saccharine overload.

Easy enough for the red-blooded straight guys since the stores are stuffed chock-full with goodies to satisfy their lovelorn belles from the cliched silk teddies to extravagant Tiffany diamonds. With sentimental melodies and romantic comedies overloading our senses this time of year, it would take a stingy heartless Scrooge indeed to abstain from the prevalent festivities.

Man on a mission
Me bring you flowers!

But somehow or rather a day like Valentine's tends to veer towards those of the feminine persuasion, so what happens when it comes to gay couples? Wining and dining would be an easy enough proposition but what's the perfect Valentine gift for a guy? Sure some of us do actually lean towards soft cuddly toys, frilly lace appliques and long-stemmed roses but then again, there are guys like me who wouldn't know the first thing to do with a stuffed baby panda - other than take it out for a wicked game of Operation. Blood-red roses and baby's breath are all nice enough but that undeniable streak of practicality in me would demand something far more lasting - perhaps a gift voucher instead.

Utterly unromantic, I know... so I've been duly informed :) Despite my predilection for sappy romances and weepy chick flicks, I have never been a hearts and flowers kinda guy after all. Not sure what it is but somehow I'd much prefer a bowl of hot chicken soup when I'm suffering to a harmonious string of verses dedicated to my perfect left brow.

Perhaps a hammer and a screwdriver for the new homeowner Charming Calvin?

9 comments:

Maximus Leo said...

Utterly overated with the commercialization of Valentine's day. I say just spend quality time at home with your loved one. That to me would bring the smile on me!! Happy Valentine's Day!!

hrugaar said...

Yeah, there's a load of commercial tat out there. But halfway decent gifts for guys ... depending on the guy's taste, of course ... cufflinks, ring, neckchain, silk tie, boxer shorts (or thong la). Single flower is nice as an extra. Meal is good. Maybe meal and cinema/theatre (or dvd at home).

Me, I'm just sharpening the knives and scrubbing my wrists in readiness. V-day, gotta be one of the most depressing days of the year.

Sue said...

My husband and I laugh because we had to spend $1,800 on eye surgery for our dog to save her sight after she smashed through a window, so that is our Valentine's day this year. It makes your present for Calvin seem simple, doesn't it? Maybe an orchid?

Jason said...

Aren't you romantic? Screw drivers and hammers. That's what every homemaker needs, maybe you should add Ikea items to the list. :p Then that would make it all perfect!

AD said...

Gifts freak me out like anything, especially if they are flowers or toys. A nice romantic candle light dinner would be perfect, hehe..

Anonymous said...

A lil' hammering & screwdriving for forplay... how romantic :P

Petie said...

Why not a matching T-Shirt? ;)

Anonymous said...

lol. i am sooooooooooooo the chocolates and flowers kinda guy! hehehehe. hallmarks has found a willing idiot in me! shucks. have fun, u n calvin.

PS wud he happen to ahve any (ahem ahem) French blood in him? *grin*

savante said...

Unfortunately can't do that, ian, as you'll know from my next post at the hospital!

Suicide is not an option for this day, ru!

Your poor dog, sue!

He already has half of ikea over there, jase.

Already did the dinner bit, ad.

Yeah, we already did the screwing and the hammering, jl.

Matching tees, Love the idea, petie!

French blood? Hmmm... why is that, closetalk?