Never could understand untalented blokes who display their pathetically minimal talent to the unappreciative audience in those hideous joints we call karaoke. Sure sweet Charming Calvin might have been swayed by the seductive siren pull of the mystical Red Box KTV but I'm hoping to pull him back from the disastrous brink before the change becomes irreversible.
Oh yeah, idolize me!
So what brings all the freaks to town for an Idol audition? Seriously every time the infamous Idol bandwagon comes around, seems like every deformed tune-deaf nutcase crawls out of the hidden cracks to perform their own awful song-and-dance number just for their two seconds of fame. Exactly what could they be thinking of? Have they gone totally deaf? Haven't they heard themselves sing?
Self-absorbed, overly confident buffoons that pompously claim to be the next world-famous operatic diva ( after being puffed up by their equally hearing challenged relatives ) but turn out sounding akin to miserable croaking frogs. Is it any wonder that the stern judges sometimes find themselves utterly at a loss after an inhuman rendition of Bohemian Rhapsody from a Kelly Clarkson wannabe?
Honestly I blame the parents and everyone else around them. Look I'm not a fan of negative criticism ( leading to years of low self-esteem and endless sessions of therapy ) but sometimes going to the other extreme with too much positive encouragement can't be good either. After little Willy has been inundated with floods of senseless praise for his yearly amateur performances by his doting parents, how is he ever going to deal with the grim, demoralizing wake-up call from the judges?
But really, I know you have ten years of vocal training from a tone-deaf teacher and a degree of performance from the University of Nitwits but...
You can't sing to save your life. Get off the stage.