Sense and Insensibility

As I feared, it took a mere four days to reach the end of my rope of resolutions. Patience and compassion were my resolutions for the year but I fear I'm hastily running short of both.

Especially when it comes to a certain delicate lady recently conscripted into service.

Hereby dubbed Milady Malady.

Barely half a sennight into her transfer to a certain department, my lady has descended into a monumental fit of vapours brought upon by the unaccustomed stress of intercontinental travel. Oh, her shattered nerves! Seems the act of transporting a mere handful of hatboxes left our simpering belle prostrate on the silk divan muttering for her salts. The insistent demands of her burly manservants - no doubt exhausted after the endless rearranging of the new living room set - had our desperate heroine whimpering for her physician.

Obviously far too overset with melancholia to work, said the good doctor. Confined to bedrest, our poor lady so beset with problems.


I'm sure no one would blame me if I popped her one.
Had I been by Milady's bedside, no doubt I would have throttled her where she lay stricken in her sprigged muslin nightgown. Maybe aimed the bejewelled snuffbox at her sadly aching head.

Quite obvious I never had much patience with women of such delicate sensibilities - even when they were fictional characters between the pages of a Jane Austen novel. Silly tiresome little widgeons. Even then I felt like symbolically ripping the offending pages off the spine just to rid myself of such bothersome creatures. Overcome with emotion? I'd probably knock them out with my anaesthetic vapours myself.

And then just today our Milady Malady had a sudden relapse due to her passel of wailing kids. Seems her overworked maid has fled into hiding leaving the entire pre-pubescent lot crying at Malady's skirts.

Malady : My children! Oh my poor children! I can't leave them alone yet I can't take care of them! How will I ever handle them!
Paul : Either make them sing Do-Re-Mi yourself or hire Sister Maria.

Seriously. Might I add that she's currently enceinte with her sixth? Now whatever shall we do with Malady.