The Pauper

Such a pity for the Prince.

Just yesterday I mentioned Yang Kang 楊康 - that cunning ( and meltingly dreamy! ) anti-hero of the Condor Heroes 射鵰英雄傳 - having to make a choice between his natural father, the ertwshile vaudeville artiste, and his adopted father, the mighty emperor. Seems like an easy enough choice for me since I'd have kicked the deadbeat dad to the kerbside. But since this is a Chinese wuxia serial that places much emphasis on supposedly noble Confucian values such as mindless loyalty to the family and country, you can imagine which father he finally chose.

So Yang Kang tries the straight, narrow and unsurprisingly destitute path.

You can only imagine how such reduced circumstances chafe on the pampered prince turned penniless pauper. Exchanging silken sheets and sedan carriages for tattered homespun rags and straw-woven slippers isn't that easy. Not only does our poor Yang Kang have to give up his wealth and privilege for a poverty-stricken life, these folks expect him to perform feats of martial prowess and acrobatic stunts on the filthy streets to earn a living.


Wanna see my spear?
How the mighty have fallen. Having to be pummelled with wooden logs by insignificant ( and shockingly spiteful ) peons for pitiful pennies.

And then bullied by ignominious minor officials.

Prince Paul : You filthy idiots with the logs, get out of my way if you want to keep your heads. You're not fit to stand so close to this noble fellow.
Yang Kang : Good morning, sir!
Prince Paul : My my... all sweaty and sexy.
Yang Kang : Fine sir, stay and watch my martial arts performance. And if you like it, please show your appreciation.
Prince Paul : I'm appreciating you right now, pretty boy.
Yang Kang : Thank you. Watch how I hold the Yang Family Spear.
Prince Paul : Delicious lil martial artist, maybe you could show me how you thrust that dangerously long spear in my quarters.
Yang Kang : Oh yes, my lord!
Prince Paul : If you're a very good boy, I'll teach you the Splitting the Fragrant Peach position as well. Matches the Straight Thrusting Spear technique perfectly.
Yang Kang : I will try my best!
Prince Paul : Very good. This bag of coins will suffice for your services? Come along then.

whispers sotto voce to menial servant

Prince Paul : Come here, sniveling worm. Hand this bag of coins to the pale, undernourished lass standing over there. His weakling fiancee Miss Mu I assume.
Menial servant : Yes, master.
Prince Paul : Tell her he's not coming back tonight.
Menial servant : Yes, master.
Prince Paul : Then again, don't tell her anything. Foolish girl's going to die from the poisoned coins anyhow. A surfeit of saccharine sweetness irritates me.
Menial servant : Yes, Master East Venom!
Prince Paul : Then see these idiots holding logs? Return later with our soldiers and kill all of them. How dare they defile my man!

Yes, vengeful monster that I am. But seriously, I'd be so much better for Yang Kang than his idiotic goody-two-shoes fiancee.

Unfortunately Yang Kang hasn't sunk to such depraved depths yet. A pity.



But poor Yang Kang. I don't blame him for turning bad. Frankly I'd go crazy myself. And probably run amuck slaughtering the innocent villagers and razing it to the ground - after battering said peons to death with their damned logs.

I don't think our arrogant aristocrat Yang Kang is gonna take it lying down either. At least not for too many episodes! I'm sure he has some wicked scheme up his sleeve. Thank God for that since I hate spineless protagonists who wring their hands helplessly while fate sweeps them hopelessly along. Better to have someone forcefully take the reins of their own lives.

Fools who hope for change to happen without lifting a finger deserve to be pummelled with logs. I'll probably give them a good whack myself.