Songs of Lorelei

With all our differing schedules, it's not easy catching up with all the Lushes at the same time. Even worse with Fabulous Fiona busy seeking knowledge of alternative medicine through the annals of acupuncture in the east. To avoid being shortchanged, we obviously needed to even out the number so we tried searching for our missing partner, Lissome Lorelei.

Took quite a while since sea sirens can really make themselves scarce. Last we heard the wicked siren had been holed up somewhere up north in an underground grotto trying to cram as much esoteric wisdom into her head as she could. Believe I even heard Lorelei was boiling notes etched into seaweed in her potent magical brew to drink!

Possibly learned from her six-month tutelage under the late Ursula the Sea Witch. Not even hunky sailors with camparis could draw her away from her studious mission.


Hard at work.
But we were undaunted. Through our excellent spy network, we managed to catch Lorelei just as she emerged for a quick breather from the deep blue. So of course we snatched her from her hidey-hole and dragged her reluctantly kicking and screaming towards the surface. Been a while since she was exposed to the brilliant sights of the land so it dazzled her quite a bit.

However Lorelei started to assimilate to the sights and sounds as she strolled past the stores singing out bargains. Though she had been away for so long, it wasn't long before we heard her own siren song.

Lorelei : Look at this stuff, isn't it neat? Wouldn't you think my collection's complete? Wouldn't you think I'm the girl? The girl who has everything?
Paul : Well, you don't have that Karen Millen dress.
Lorelei : Look at this mall, treasures untold! How many wonders can one boutique hold? I want gadgets and gizmos a-plenty! I want who's-its and what's-its galore!
Paul : You want thing-a-mabobs? It's on sale at 70% off.
Lorelei : I want more! I wanna be where the people are! I wanna see, wanna see 'em shopping!

How was I to refuse? Short of being forcibly chained to a post with plugs in his ears, I doubt any man could say no to such a seductive siren call.


Freedom on land.
Obviously flippin' her fins, she don't get too far! Fortunately Lorelei had some quick legs - short though they were. Together with the rest of the Lushes - and Charming Calvin, we then headed for a whirlwind tour of every boutique in the valley shoving skimpy lil numbers at the siren. Think a re-enactment of the 27 Dresses.

Sirens obviously love their shiny trinkets.