Thursday, January 08, 2009

Baby iBlair

We have a new baby.

Or at least Charming Calvin has.

Like any expectant father, I didn't have as much input into this blessed baby bargain other than a lazy nod at its inception.

Of course the proverbial stork didn't drop by our doorstep unexpectedly! Been quite a while since Calvin started dreaming of having it. Ever since a couple of my friends started having babies of their own, he's been hankering for one of his own to teach, to nurture and to love. The one year he spent in Beijing only underlined the urgent need to fulfil his budding parental instincts ( not to mention providing the necessary infusion of capital! ).

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So we'll get the baby?

Parenthood isn't something to be taken lightly. I figured it was timely to wait till we were ready but Calvin was insistent enough.

There were plenty to be had in the market of course - legal or otherwise - but Charming Calvin decided to take the safer course by waiting patiently while the necessary bureaucratic red tape was negotiated. The man doesn't believe in shortcuts. After reviewing various bits of literature, friendly advice and also his conscience, Calvin decided to make the daring leap.

Calvin : I need to get it.
Paul : This is a big step. You know you can't turn back. You sure you're ready?
Calvin : I can take care of it. I'm sure.
Paul : Doesn't come in that many colours.
Calvin : I'm happy with what they have! It'll be mine! We'll love it!

So the baby was left on the doorstep, wrapped up in its leather vinyl bassinet. All black, shiny and surprisingly lightweight.

Despite its shockingly varied functions.

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That's not the baby I ordered!

And we got it from Machines at a bargain. The iPod Touch he's been waiting for. And though it might be chips and bytes out of a developing third world nation rather than his own flesh and blood, it doesn't make him any less attached to it. Even just yesterday I caught him cradling the iPod Touch while cooing inane babytalk. Could have sworn the lil baby protege sang Celine Dion's My Love in return.

Genius.

He's calling it baby iBlair.

Though not particularly huggable, at least the baby's cute in addition to being intelligent. So how about some cigars then?

12 comments:

Alex said...

Resistance to iPod Touch is futile. Get one, Paul. Or you can buy my iPod nano at a cheap price.

Mr.D said...

I don't get all the fuss about the gadgets at all. Haha.

nase said...

Not an ugly baby, yeah.. lol. That's cute, iBlair. wonder whether the Rattie from across the South China Sea can get me one too.

Altantuya Feels said...

would love to have the ipod touch!!

but ermmm....can it explode if used non-stop?

or maybe i'll just use that to throw at someone if i'm pissed.

talk about having a naomi campbell temperament...wakakaka ;P

Janvier said...

It won't be long before Baby iChuck joins the family?

RPMnut said...

So when's Baby iBlair's full-moon party? :D
An invite better be coming my way, Herr Doctor! :P hur hur

Chris said...

I like gadgets as well.. especially all the new tech..

a said...

Hahaha, Calvin is sooo Calvin. But yeah, he will take good care of it for sure... Not sure what is the next baby he wants now...

The Vice Buddha said...

So far so good! :)

Calvin's been acting mature lately, eh? Assuming responsibilities.... indeed a big step :)

Lol!

The Vice Buddha said...

Oh and by the way, am i invited to the baby shower?

Anonymous said...

Oh darnit! I really thought you guys were gonna get a baby! (I guess somewhere else has bundleofjoyitis also. Hehe.)

William said...

Will you be distributing Full Moon boxes?