Then again I shouldn't blame the innocent waif - since the real culprit's obviously her sainted mama. Apparently not content with her single botched plan at a shotgun marriage with the unerring help of my mother, Sibyl's Mama has gone one step further by accosting my sister-in-law instead.
Sibyl's Mama : So how is Paul? Is he alright?
Sister-in-law : Perfectly okay I guess.
Sibyl's Mama : Still no girlfriend?
Sister-in-law : Definitely no girlfriend. Doubt he'll ever have one!
Sibyl's Mama : But what a shame that would be. Isn't it about time he got married?
Sister-in-law : Well I'm sure he's quite capable of finding his own partner.
Sibyl's Mama : But some things need a gentle push. What do you think of him with Sibyl?
Sister-in-law : WTF.
Persistent as ever despite the many premarital setbacks, Sibyl's Mama has decided to pull all the stops. Apparently Sibyl's unmarried status at her age keeps her mama awake nights! Wouldn't surprise me if I found Sibyl's Mama camped at my doorstep with her daughter waiting in a bridal sedan chair.
Paul : I'm gay, get it? Homosexual. Faggot. Gay.
Sibyl : Negligible. So how about it?
Paul : Well I do like the princess cut.
Not exactly the proposal I was looking for.
Of course my sister-in-law had been forewarned prior to the phone call. Seems our surprisingly resourceful Sibyl had already tried to acquire information from my hapless sister-in-law before. Can't imagine what prompted the delusional creature to inquire since I hardly paid her any attention when I knew her! Surely I can't be held to blame since I didn't set out any unscrupulous lures, I swear!
Unless buying her one dinner amounted to a wedding proposal.
Note to self - Be as hostile as possible to impressionable girls of marriageable age. In fact bury all manner of friendly impulse if possible. Especially when shockingly tenacious matchmaking mamas are in the background.
And yes, I do need an alliterative nickname for my sister-in-law ( starting to be more like my sister actually ). Ideas?