Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Repent Or Die

Obviously that's what gay men have to do to make it big in our local cinemas.

According to the latest reports by our wildly unprogressive national censorship board, it's finally perfectly alright to portray a fabulous gay men only if he either repents or dies. Pretty grim choices.

"We are now allowed to show these scenes. As long as we portray good triumphing over evil and there is a lesson learnt in the film, such as from a gay (character) who turns into a (straight) man."


What a pathetic concession!

Obviously our moral police are still desperately hanging on to the concept that sexuality is a choice. Either seek repentance or face retribution. What they don't know is the choice ( if that's even a choice! ) is clear for some flaming faggots! Turning straight would certainly be the death of us.

Muffia
Repent or die? Eh, can I at least fuck him first?

Repent & die so to speak.

Fortunately most gay-themed movies are already heartbreakingly tragic with the leading protagonists usually suffering a miserable end - so I figure these would theoretically make it through the censors. With the prerequisite sex scenes liberally hacked away by our scissor-happy censors of course.

Of course with every inane rule created, there's always a loophole left somewhere.

After all gay men are generally stereotyped as creative, imaginative sorts! I'm sure if we all put our heads together, we can find a way to circumvent this particularly idiotic precept! Perhaps an adaptation of Sodom & Gomorrah before the flooding? Maybe have a wildly pornographic homosexual orgy which ends with the Biblical cataclysm? Or Atlantis submerging? Or the Titanic sinking?

At least the word gay isn't taboo anymore. Still considered evil but hey, we gotta celebrate the little victories.

10 comments:

Life for Beginners said...

Here's to being evil. Some days, it's nice being a little taboo. ;)

kidz said...

in this era, unless they blocked the internet, else gay information will still be flooding around, and looking at our gov ability, definitely not something they are capable of achieving unless they shut the entire country connection =p

gay will still be gay, it's just the impression to the public that they are shaping with this move, but still, young ppl r generally open minded.. so in the long run it is just another mindless act..

William said...

That means I can make a movie where a prominent politician turns gay and turns back straight and coins a stupid unity slogan that brings the country to a new era?

Evann said...

Oh well, I like being bad. Cuz when I'm bad, I'm very good. ;)

Cheryl said...

oh that news... i heard it yest and think that is so stupid.

Bradley Hyunckel said...

where the men,there the gay,here we are.

nicky05 said...

huhh!!! Then those films better download from internet. lol

said...

can they accept lesbian? haha~ make the lesbo die :P

Gratitude said...

First, God created idiots. That was just for practice. Then He created censorship boards.
+Ant+

Bravebear said...

err... repent or not oso have to die ma? not?