Prudes and Prejudice

Obviously my reputation as a calm, sensible fellow has been ripped to shreds.

Especially after my sudden outburst at the meeting last week. Hard to maintain any sort of strict decorum after I almost banged the table in frustration. Almost. So much for being zen. You couldn't very well expect me to remain silent while the rest were spewing such opprobrious rubbish, could you?

You see the wards here have always practiced a peculiar gender bias. While female caretakers are welcomed in all the open wards, male caretakers / relatives are frowned upon in the female and children wards. Solely based on the theory that all men are obviously crazed sexual perverts with zero self-control. The seductive sight of a wrinkled octogenarian female patient in crutches is surely enough to inflame their uninhibited passions.

What rubbish. Believe me when I say not even a nubile nymphette of sixteen can arouse when she's busy hurling chunks of her bloody lungs all over the floor.


Wait, let me get this right. We're barred from the wards at night because we turn into rapacious sexual beasts after dark?
Don't even get me going on the topic of sexual segregation based on that erroneous theory. Baby changing rooms which forbid men from entering already piss me off. Do they expect the single dads to change the diapers on the supermarket floor instead?

So when the nursing staff started voicing such concerns - citing the uncontrolled lusts of men, it obviously put me in a flame as well.

Paul : Wouldn't it be easier to just be more vigilant in the wards?
Nurse : But it's hard to control the men.
Paul : Talk about gender bias. Are you seriously tarring all male caretakers with that same prejudiced brush?
Nurse : But the men can't control themselves.
Paul : So all men automatically lose their heads the moment they see a vulnerable female? I'm sure that's what we'd call defamation.
Nurse : No, but..
Paul : So what next? Female patients being examined only by female physicians? Male nurses only for male wards?

Why pander to such unprogressive parochial notions! Don't even think we should let such foolish prejudices take root. Nip such unthinking conservatism in the bud before it even begins! Just about to launch into an entire crazed diatribe about sexual segregation in buses and queues.

Poor lady obviously got me on an insane roll. Guess it's true that you don't wake a sleeping dragon. Pretty reasonable usually till someone nudges one of my sore points.

All this while the rest of the hall stared agog at my rants.

No wonder I'm recognized.

The foolishness of it all. Come on, haven't these nurses heard about homosexuality? Following Kinsey's rule, you'd have at least a handful of homos amongst the lot. Wouldn't the wanton, unbridled male patients in the wards be all over each other enacting a wild Bel Ami orgy? How do we separate everyone then?