Thursday, December 06, 2012

Baby It's Cold Outside

Woman : Oh you must wear a condom. No glove, no love.
Man : Nah, I don't do condoms.
Woman : But why? 
Man : I can't get an erection when I wear one. 
Woman : Oh then it's okay.

Seriously? Sometimes I can understand when credulous females fall for this incredibly lame excuse that even the thinnest of condoms, almost feather light, would cause their formerly rampant erections to spontaneously wilt. Not being blessed - or cursed - with a penis themselves, you couldn't expect the poor bamboozled girls to know any better.

Oh boy, you ain't coming anywhere near my fine ass without a condom.

But you'd think that gay men - which by definition would be in possession of their own genitals and surely fiddled with them semi-regularly - would be far less susceptible to such deplorable schemes to deny the glove. Especially with the ever-present threat of pernicious sexually transmitted diseases around.

Apparently I was wrong.

Paul : You mean that stupid excuse that it doesn't have much feeling works on guys too?
Marshall : Yes?
Paul : And he said he can't get it up when he wears a condom?
Marshall : Yes?
Paul : And you believed it?
Marshall : Yes?
Paul : Bloody hell, you have a penis too!
Marshall : Yes?
Paul : Did you seriously phrase that as a question?

Honestly never had much of a problem with the rubber. Even a stiff wind gets me hard after all. And hell, imagining waiting out there at the hospital corridor for the test results confirming STD is enough to have me slip one on.

Look I can understand that there'll be some appreciable loss of sensation when that latex barrier first slips on. Couple that with a substantial psychological hurdle - omg it's gonna get soft - and it can grow to be quite daunting. Certainly enough to scare away a budding erection.

But hey, there are so many exhilarating ways to bring it back. :)

Sure, baby it's numb inside but you still gotta wear that condom.


Chen Xing said...

So, on a strong windy will get an erection ?


Aaron Ng said...

but most ppl mmg dun like to use condoms ma... then end up pregnant at 16 =.=

oh! i love that J,hud + buble song~ =p

curious said...

To aaron ng, then do u use condom? =)

Aiden said...

I've always wondered about that windy day thing. I went to an all boys school and I always hear them talking about this >_>

savante said...

Depends on which way the wind is blowing, chenxing. :)

Love it too but still prefer the Blaine and Kurt version, aaron.

Hope he does, curious, if not I will have to spank him hard.

True for me, aiden :)

Anonymous Esq. said...

Not using a condom just because it allegedly reduces one's sensitivity during coitus is a very stupid excuse. If men can even start a hot and heavy erection with pants on, then surely skin-thin rubber wouldn't dent a single bit of their hot moment...neanderthals indeed.

Chen Xing said...

Haha, ok.