Farming at the Touch of a Button

It's almost midnight on a weekend and I'm still busy in my garden patch planting my pumpkins and squash. Sweat is dripping off my brow as I plow the soil - manually by hand since I can barely afford the shockingly expensive tractor. The pink cow's probably ready to be milked by morning. Which gives me about 6 hours of sleep before getting up at the crack of dawn to tend to the cows.

And harvest the wheat.

Fortunately it's all at the touch of a button. Despite my little foray with gardening, I don't do perspiration.

Unless it's sex with a sexy post-juvenile gardener on the muddy ground.


Could I help plow your fields?
Fortunately we have Farmville since the sweltering heat here is killing every green thing I shove into the ground. Or it could be the endless dust balls choking them.

Obviously a yearning for the pastoral life since it seems like I'm not the only one harvesting tulips at inordinately late hours. Half the online facebook world's doing it as well - more than 62 million actually - tilling the land and harvesting their vegetables on Farmville. The other half is reputedly making Farmville art, arranging hay bales and farm plots to resemble expressionist paintings.

Seriously. Mona Lisa in brown hay bales.

Addictive enough that folks are even leaving early from their dinner dates to check on their pattypan squash.

The game starts off simply enough : Land is handed out in plots where seeds can be planted, harvested and sold. Crows and bugs can attack but fortunately neighbours can step in to help. As the finances improve, things can be purchased from the market from basics like rice and pumpkin seeds to the truly superfluous, like elephants and hot-air balloons. If only I could hire fresh-faced country boys to help out in the fields.

So hey, go give me a tree.