The Winter of Our Discontent

The world I lived in never handed me fanciful rose-tinted glasses so I've always been far from the idealist. Perhaps leaned a little close to being a jaded, world-weary cynic back in high school even. A few years back I'd have scoffed at the very idea of me holding up the banner for idealism.

But as I begin to find my footing in the world, I find myself dusting off those cherished ideals of old and finding them still worthwhile. Perhaps dulled by years of mindless drudgery at work and school - but polish them off and there's still there's a bright gleam underneath the grime.


Fuck ideals! I've got enough of this menial, low-paying job!
Irrelevant quotes from an ancient dullard I used to call the Hippocratic Oath. Especially after 48 grueling hours of mind-numbingly exhausting work as an overworked house officer. Surprisingly though as the years go by - and the work thankfully becomes easier, I've started to reassess the words I spoke so cavalierly before and finding the oath eminently compatible even in our contemporary world of medicine.

Certainly helped that I managed to keep my semi-utopian ideals throughout my working career. In some of my more difficult cases, I've found myself repeating the words primum non nocere to myself in something close to a religious mantra. Easier said than done of course especially when an exasperating handful might deserve just that little bit of harm :)

Sometimes it seems nearly impossible to hold on to such juvenile ideals once we're out in the big, wicked world. How often have I heard a colleague say that he had had enough - and that he was going to do it all for the money? Seems almost foolish to cherish such antiquated notions in the days of crass commerce and capitalism where our more fortunate colleagues zip by in slick luxury cars to shockingly brief 15-minute consultations. Even one flick of the stethoscope costs a bundle.

Yet we must always remember that physicians heal people, and the more we become businessmen and public relations representatives in rabid pursuit of the almighty dollar, the more we compromise this vital function. Medicine without ideals or ethics? I shudder at the very thought.

You'd expect such noble aspirations to hold true for other professions but you'd be wrong. A quick dialogue about our working ideals left me distressed as I found everyone else mindlessly worshipping on the altar of financial cornucopia instead. Literally screw ideals over for the big bucks. Acceptable for those of us grown jaded with work but such misanthropic cynicism coming from the mouths of relative babes! Bright young sparks the twinkling dawn of their careers!

What the hell happened to the fiery idealism of youth? Extinguished by the the Gucci heel of commerce?