How I Got My Beard

With my persistent bachelorhood, my adoration for Madonna and my penchant for sarcastic one-liners, I don't think I could get any gayer at work. No doubt I've pinged quite a few gaydars here.

Which is why my beard must have confounded quite a few suspicions today.

With the hospital celebrating Nurses Day with a dinner function, I was talked into buying a ticket. Seeing how I'ved tried to avoid most after-hours activities, I decided to make an appearnce just this once. Only to have Piratin Patty interject with her suggestion.

Patty : Sounds like fun! Bring me along!
Paul : As my beard?
Patty : Why not introduce me as your social escort?
Paul : Now that would have the tongues wagging.
Patty : Even better. Let's give them something to talk about!

Certainly achieved that goal since dozens of curious eyes swung my way - followed by audible whispers - as I walked in with Piratin Patty. Though the nurses were all glammed up in their blazing finery - chandelier earrings, glittering tiaras and all, I don't think anyone attracted as much comment as the plainly dressed Patty.


What girl/ You mean the one behind me?
Though I'm glad she refrained from dressing in ratty jeans and a tattered tee as she originally intended. There's only so much 'casual' I can take. :)

Caused quite a stir even in her little black dress. Though Patty must have been perfectly oblivious, fingers were pointed her way while tongues started wagging throughout the dinner. Unfortunately few believed the tales of me hiring her as a social escort.

Nurse A : Paul brought a girl?
Nurse B : Yes, a real girl! Patty!
Nurse A : Not a social escort as rumoured?
Nurse B : I know! And I thought he's so gay!
Nurse A : Obviously not!
Nurse B : So who is the girl?

Hardly able to contain their curiousity, an entire cadre of nurses waylaid me in the morning as I went to work demanding her name. Nothing that group of matchmakers like better than a lil bit of gossip. And no, they still wouldn't believe that I'd picked her up soliciting by the back alleys.

Still it's always nice to add to the hospital grapevine.

Amusingly enough the nurses did a reasonably good rendition of the Wonder Girls during the dinner at my suggestion!