The Twitch

Seems like my colleague Timber Tom might have a thing there when he claimed that the hospital's a rampant hotbed of homosexuality. Especially since I've managed to confirm a number of his telling suspicions the past few weeks.

Such as Marvy Maarof.

Just the other day I walked into Marvy Maarof - sans wife - with an even hotter fellow in tow. Seriously. If I ever found Maarof simply doable, his pal looked even better spread invitingly over a table. At least that's what I immediately imagined in my libidinous mind.

Obviously I had to say a friendly hello.

Needless to say, Maarof nearly keeled over in fright at the sight of me walking his way ( obviously not expecting a fellow zombie physician stalking the malls ) but managed to retain some semblance of composure, mumbling a muffled greeting in reply to my overly hearty one. His supposed friend stood by smiling helplessly as I gave him the curious once-over.

Of course that's not enough for a homo-conviction. After all his friend could have been a long-lost buddy who just happened to be in tight jeans, tanktop and perfectly coiffeured curls. Who also happened to be walking suspiciously close - close enough to be regarded as an invasion of personal space by heterosexual male definitions.


B-but I-I'm not g-gay...
So I had to catch the shockingly reticent Maarof alone in the changing room the next day after work. I seem to be confronting a lot of folks in changing rooms. :) Was hoping the tanned cutie would be astonished enough to drop his scrubs pants but obviously he was made of sterner stuff.

Paul : You guys looked really good together.
Maarof : Thanks.
Paul : Especially your cute friend.
Maarof : My f-friend? Oh yeah, my friend.
Paul : And he's only your friend? Nothing else?
Maarof : Umm... y-yeah. He's only a friend.

Perhaps I could have beat around the bush a bit - perhaps hoped for a slip - but impatience is making me sloppy these days. I even had to add sly emphasis to the word friend with a raised eyebrow though I stopped short of making air quotes.

So what's the verdict? Surely any hopelessly straight fella would be the first to deny the accusation vociferously. Flat out without qualification. No ifs ands or buts. The slightest hint of hesitation reeks of homo-suspicion.

And then Maarof's eye twitched tellingly.