Thursday, July 11, 2013

All About Wisdom

Turns out wisdom comes at a price.

For me, it came up to about two sleepless nights, a massive headache and a bloodied gauze.

Since I was a kid, I've been fortunate enough not to have much trouble with my teeth. Apart from the horrible two-year brush with nightmarish orthodontia, generally my upstanding chompers have held up pretty well against the brutal ravages of unmindful dietary intake.

Then two nights ago whilst in the middle of dreamless sleep, I sprang up wide awake with a throbbing ache in my jaw. Seriously felt like I'd been sucker punched while I was asleep. Quick look around had me concluding that my teeth had to be acting up since there didn't seem to be an unknown assailant lying in wait.

Oh God that's way too much wisdom for one man to take!

Took me a couple hours of unbearable pain and patchy sleep - not to mention a terribly grumpy half-day at work - before I duly presented myself at the chirpy dentist who cheerfully informed me that I had an impacted wisdom tooth. Figures it took that long for wisdom to arrive.

Paul : Whatever it is, yank it. 
Dentist : Oh it's an impacted wisdom tooth.
Paul : Yank it. 
Dentist : It all depends. We can always..
Paul : Yank it. 
Dentist : Doesn't mean we have to do that all the time. Sometimes it can recover and...
Paul : Yank it.
Dentist : Or we can yank it. 

Pulling out teeth is just as trite as it sounds.

And twice as painful. Rather than the terrifying needles and the monstrous pliers, what pained me the most was the interminable wait at the waiting room while supposedly soporific music played. Face-numbing procedure took all of fifteen minutes as they skilfully yanked the wisdom tooth out while I sat there praying they would just switch off the mind-numbingly dull elevator music.

So now I have only three quarters the wisdom I had before. Hopefully that's enough to last me. 

1 comment:

Yours Queerly said...

Am lucky enough to have my first wisdom tooth out and I have space for it to grow. No yanking for now!