Thursday, July 24, 2014

China Dolls V : The Baby Doll Edition

Years back I recall my grandmother sitting me down at the dining table to proffer an intriguing bit of advice. Didn't know why she would suddenly come up with such peculiar instruction but like any obedient Chinese boy, I just quietly listened. By the way, she probably still had some wildly farfetched notions about my presumed heterosexuality back then as well. 

Grandma : Still have no girlfriend?
Paul : Don't plan to have one. 
Grandma : Why not!
Paul : Only want a girl from China. 
Grandma : No! Don't marry a girl from mainland China!
Paul : But why! You're an immigrant from China as well!
Grandma : They don't make girls in China the way they used to. Trust me. Very different.
Paul : Ooookay.

Of course I had no idea what she had actually meant with her cryptic announcement - and never bothered to take her well-meaning advice to heart since seducing or being seduced by a tempting China Doll didn't feature much in my future plans. Besides with the way my sexual proclivities seemed to be leaning, it didn't seem at all probable. 

And Chinese Hunks - far more probable as an object of my affection - seemed few on the ground back then. 

It is only lately with my general practice at work seemingly encompassing a surprisingly large section of the mainland China Doll community that I am starting to understand the surprising wisdom of her words! Straight fellas out there, listen well...  judging by the majority of the girls that flutter into my ambit, I would suggest reconsidering any serious thought of marrying them. 

So think twice. Unless you have the masochistic urge to be tied to a weepy, whiny weakling.

Damn these Dolls!

Or at least I hope they pretend to be that way in the presence of the man. 

Girl : Oww.. I am so scared of the hospital. Ooooo....
Paul : There's nothing to be afraid of here. 
Girl : Oh, the lights so scary! Oh, the room so terrifying! I want my boyfriend here. 
Paul : You're past the age of consent. You don't need a caretaker to hold your hand. 
Girl : Bwahhhh.... will it be painful?
Paul : I'm stabbing you with a needle, what do you think?
Girl : I want my mummy!

Okay, I'll admit I'm less than charming when faced with such childish behaviour.

More baby doll than doll, up to the point that they even squeal in a high-pitched babyish voice just to get their way. Super 小姐 we call them. Which I find quite peculiar since I have no idea how these spoilt, petulant misses actually got this way. An odd sense of self entitlement due to the single child policy? Raised to such coy, pettish behaviour solely to entice those macho macho men?

Do men really love these peevish baby dolls? 


Tempus said...

Those who lack intelligence, probably.

It's always about personality and brains today; no longer just looks and *oh you are so smart la*

Anonymous said...

You do realise that '小姐' means 'prostitute' to them right? Or maybe that was intended LOL!

savante said...

Very true, tempus!

Partly intentional, anon!