Monday, June 13, 2016

Mystery of the Missing Underwear

Remember the time I mentioned the unreasonably spartan environment in the men's locker room? Short of the occasional dirty shoe, anything remotely dissimilar would immediately stand out in such stark surroundings which is how I chanced upon something quite surprising today.

Leaving sports shoes behind, I could understand. Prepared for every eventuality, even I switch back to my work loafers before I leave so it stands that I could reasonably lose sight of my gym shoes when I hastily pack to head home. Items specifically used in the gym such as dirty sweat towels and used socks come with the territory as well.

Maybe even the odd misplaced headphones. Or a water bottle.

But today as I was stepping into the shower, I noticed something floridly scarlet on the floors - made even more blatant by the pristinely white tiles. Surprisingly a pair of men's underwear. In fact a red pair of briefs seemingly crumpled and tossed aside.

Thankfully not mine. Though I'd be curious if someone wanted to snatch mine.

So who could it belong to? Casually discarded underwear would doubtlessly be de rigueur at the best gay clubs but here in our suburban neighbourhood gym, it's just a little out of the common. So I was left wondering how someone brazenly left the gym apparently without his knickers on, all free-balling!

Since I have no clue to the original owner, I shall persuade myself that he looks just this fetching in his red briefs. 

The more sensible amongst you - or rather the more sadly unimaginative - would of course point to the fact that some boys actually come with a full change of clothes to the gym showers, which includes a new pair of underthings. All of which would easily explain the briefs forlornly left behind.


My thoughts are thankfully far more sensational and lean towards the idea that the racy scarlet briefs were left behind after a hurried tryst. In the gym. In the men's locker room. Ooh la la, how very deliciously scandalous. Now I'm only left wondering which of the brawny college boys I'd seen earlier grunting and groaning had been involved in the above affaire.


William said...

Maybe it had skid marks, so he decided to ditch it.

savante said...

Eeek! Fortunately I didn't pick it up!