Friday, August 22, 2014


Ten years into the job and very little surprises ye olde cynical me anymore. From the ludicrous to the macabre, we've seen the farcical mysteries of life spin through the halls of the hospital. Surprise long-hidden stepfamily creeps out from the cracks at the deathbed? Seen that. Miracle infant pops out from teenage girl after months of mysterious stomach ailments? Seen that. Nurse and physician, both supposedly married, having an afternoon delight in the linen closet to burn calories? Seen that.

Rather than have my nurses assume I've turned into a dispassionate android, I've even managed to school my usually impassive features into at least some animated semblance of surprise, ready to activate the moment something seemingly impossible happens. At least have a ready gasp of amazement.

Then I get something like this. 

Friend : Hey, are you free this weekend? 
Paul : Sure. What's up? 
Friend : Do you know where I could score some weed? 
Paul : What? 
Friend : You know. Weed. 
Paul : What? 
Friend : To smoke with?
Paul : I know weed but what?
Friend : So you know where to get it? Or at least a fella who deals? 
Paul : OMG.

Yes, things still do surprise me apparently. 

Though I might usually appear worldly and quite sophisticated, some questions still leave me completely non-plussed! Gosh I felt like I was back in college. Sure I might have some vague idea where to find such contraband products - we tend to have a motley crew of patients from all walks of life, even some of the darker byways - but do I appear so shockingly permissive that I would condone such reckless behaviour?

I'm gay, not irresponsible.

Dammit I told her not to smoke that reefer in the office.

Generally having sane adults getting high and stoned doesn't bother me, as long as it's within limits. So go ahead and smoke it in Amsterdam, even bake it in delish brownies if you want - but don't do this at home, especially if you're here in Malaysia. In case some of us have casually forgotten, the Malaysian legislation provides a mandatory death penalty for convicted drug traffickers. Individuals arrested in possession of 15 grams of heroin or 200 grams of marijuana are presumed by law to be trafficking in drugs.

It's illegal. So kids, take this as a friendly warning. 

And yes, even if you're a reasonably mature adult, you never know when you're just gonna go over the brink when it comes to an addiction.

No comments: