The Powder Room

Unless you personally design your own mansion from the ground up, you'll generally find that most housing developers here build surprisingly small bathrooms into their cookie-cutter generic designs. No matter the size of the house, or even the bedroom in question, you'll find toilets here remarkably minuscule. With the recent trend leaning towards vast sumptuous mini spas in the home, I simply cannot fathom why they would insert a singularly cramped cubby-hole - almost as a forgotten aside - as the supposed ensuite bathroom for an extensive bedroom.

I mean I don't expect to organize a full-on mind-blowing orgy with the entire football team in the bathroom but at least give me reasonable space for one broad-shouldered quarterback and me!

All I can think of is that toilets are customarily considered negative places that should be closed off or ignored in traditional feng shui - all thanks to the days where bathrooms tended to be horribly derelict outhouses left forsaken in the farthest reaches of the manse. Surely that's the reason for the tiny toilets, yes?

So I can strut across the bathroom tiles dropping clothes like this?

Whatever it is, I have decided to knock down part of the bedroom to allow space for the adjoining bathroom. I don't see why I should have a severely restricted closet to have a shower and shave! Along with the imagined plans for Hartfield, I sketched in a larger window right next to the shower area - which prompted a horrified response from Charming Calvin.

Calvin : Is that a window? 
Paul : Yeah, I figured I needed more light in the bathroom so why not get large windows that stretch almost to the floor. 
Calvin : It's right next to the shower!
Paul : Yes, I know. I drew that. 
Calvin : Your neighbours can see right in!
Paul : I can wave hello. 
Calvin : You'd be naked!
Paul : So? I don't have body image issues. 
Calvin : What would the neighbours think!
Paul : Am I supposed to care? 
Calvin : They might take pictures!
Paul : Well I hope I look good in them. 

Which sufficiently explains why toilets here have such miserably microscopic vents for windows.

Frankly I don't really care. So what if the curious neighbours peek in? Seems I get less bothered about what the rest of the world thinks the older I get. What's wrong about having a shower en déshabillé in the privacy of my own home? There are times when I'm barely dressed at home, especially with the infernal heat of the tropics. In my time I've even gone skinny dipping on some of the secluded beaches - without the interference of our overly judgemental moral police.

Honestly if I had a sculpted physique like Chris Evans, I would probably be parading naked all the time.

But compromises have to be made, at least to satisfy Calvin who's practically up in arms over the shocking impropriety of said bathroom. For my prudish Calvin's sake, perhaps the windows would only come down to about waist level. Surely that's enough to placate the delicate sensibilities of everyone in question?