Friday, March 27, 2015

Samuel and the Gay Doctor

You know those days when in an impulsive fit of rage, you just need to rant and rave irrationally over something wildly controversial only to realize much, much too late that the intended target of your highly unreasonable abuse is right within hearing range? If not right in your face?

Tropes that happens quite a lot in situational comedies, which probably draws from real life since it actually happened just today.

Fortunately not to me.

In the gym that I frequent, there's Stunning Samuel, this young... hell, let's just call him an extremely fit, handsome young fellow because that's what he is. Gorgeous college boy with the perfect toothy smile, fair unblemished face and a sculpted, muscular physique that gets even better each time I see it. Which is surprisingly often since he heads to the weight room during his lunch hour which coincides with my time there.

Believe me when I say perfectly cut six-pack abs all the way.

Dammit do they ever eat fried chicken?!

Genetically gifted in almost every way except for his physical coordination. You see, our poor Stunning Samuel is a clumsy klutz. Items inevitably topple out of his gym bag, weighted dumbbells tumble onto his toes, steps flip over as he steps on, shoelaces tangle before him as he trips over etc. Basically the kinda lame slapstick comedy we expect from the Three Stooges except it's a painful pantomime all on his own.

In fact I've even mended his broken finger when he somehow trapped it between the weight plates several months back. Don't ask me how it suddenly got there. First he was cheerfully waving to me from the weights with a grin on his handsome face - and the next there's blood dripping all over the place. Hippocratic Oath and all that so I had to help.

So unsurprisingly, Samuel found himself in another mishap of his own making when he somehow tumbled and broke his arm. Of course by the time he came around to my door at work, he had already been through the emergency department with a couple of peculiar gripes.

Samuel : Aiyo so glad to see you.
Paul : And this time you did break a bone.
Samuel : Yeah, but the doctor downstairs was gay. 
Paul : He was?
Samuel : Yea la! That gay doctor! And you know what he did!
Paul : You know I'm gay right.
Samuel : What?
Paul : Yes.
Samuel : Oh... umm, but you're different.
Paul : Like how?
Samuel : Just different la.

So now I'm a different gay. Of course Samuel probably had a few choice epithets ready to blurt out before I forestalled him by coming out! After learning about my wicked sexual proclivities, Samuel clammed up and refused to tell me what the doctor did to him! Said it wasn't a big deal after all.

Which has made me awfully curious.

A naughty proposition? Looking at Samuel, I don't think I could blame that doctor.


dazzakoh said...

But doctor! He's a patient! Ethics!

Anonymous Esq. said...

Haha, what on earth could have happened between Sam and the 'other gay doc'?

Just curious. He broke his arm right? He wasn't coming in with an inguinal hernia wasn't he?

Shouldn't have let the cat out of the bag so soon. Let him spill the beans, then maybe you'll know what the 'other gay doc' has been up to ><

But again, Medical Ethics prevails.

William said...

If the doctor downstair suggested something with a skankiness factor of 5, perhaps if you suggested something at a range of 2 to 3, perhaps he would be more obliging.

savante said...

No idea what happened though so I can't comment, dazzakoh. Will try to dig more information out!

All sorts of wicked ideas come to mind but I'm trying to tamp it down, anon!

True, William. And he's not my patient!