Let's be honest, most women just want bragging rights to say that their soon-to-be husband is wildly romantic and have her envious bosom buddies ( and most especially her frenemies ) squeal over it when she tells them how he proposed.
And then we have Virginal Vesper.
Vesper : I can't even look at you when I say it.
Paul : Couldn't have been that bad a proposal.
Vesper : Trust me, it was. What should I do?
Paul : Other than throw the ring at his face?
Vesper : There is no ring.
Paul : Now I know why you're at therapy.
After almost a decade of pining for the ring, her significant other finally gave in. But rather than opt for something wildly extravagant like a romantic carriage ride through the park, he proposed through instant messaging instead.
Till now we're not even sure if it's valid.
Vesper : He gave me a date, asked me I liked it.
Paul : A date for what?
Vesper : I have no idea. I think maybe a wedding?
Paul : Just like that! No whispers of sweet nothings? No vows and promises of love and commitment?
Vesper : No. Just a date and a message asking if it's alright.
Paul : I am a terribly unsentimental fellow with little need for grand gestures... but even I would have smashed the phone to little pieces.
Seriously what's wrong with some heterosexual men?
I fully understand that the wedding is only the beginning of a lifelong journey but surely even that deserves a bit of festive fanfare. Don't expect all that much but is it too much to ask for a candlelight dinner and some champagne? Sure it's a damned cliche but it's a far sight better than a 'hey why not we get married' proposal.
Might as well just head for the civil registry.
And most horrifyingly there's not even a ring. Even a cheap, tacky beer tab would have been better than nothing.