Christmastime also marks the time when I wait patiently for the elusive mailman to arrive. Especially this far in the boondocks, the mailman can sometimes be our only lifeline to the real world out there - at least that of the material sort. Unfortunately there doesn't seem to be any proper schedule for the slippery fellow who seems to pop by according to his volatile whims and wants.
Honestly Santa would be easier to catch than our unreliable mailman.
But not only does he deliver the sadly mundane such as bills and solicitations, during the magical month of December he also drops the occasional Christmas card. And of course, my favourite brown paper packages tied up with string -- all bought online the weeks before Christmas.
After all I still need to send my ISO some coal with his black stockings. Though it also comes with similarly coloured charcoal body soap this year.
My ISO : It's all black. What the hell did you send me?
Paul : Coal.
My ISO : So I toss them into the fire?
Paul : There's only one lump of coal. The rest are soap!
My ISO : Black soap. Seriously?
Paul : Well it's to wash away your evil deeds this year!
My ISO : You didn't get me enough soap for that!
Have to assume my ISO flirts shamelessly with the usually grumpy mailroom workers to get his gifts sent out promptly every year since it usually arrives surprisingly early. Surely he doesn't actually queue up at the post office since that very idea of such patient selflessness on his part boggles my mind.
Which is why I have a wrapped gift box waiting to be opened very, very soon.
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